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Muhammad told the household of Abu Bakr, without mentioning his reason, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position.” A few days later, Aisha became upset with her mother and complained to her father. Abu Bakr was angry with both of them, and Umm Ruman vented her annoyance on Aisha. Aisha hid behind the front door to sob and was in this state of distress when Muhammad, arriving for his daily visit, asked what was wrong. She blurted out everything. Muhammad immediately confronted Umm Ruman, saying, “Didn’t I tell you to look after Aisha for me?” Umm Ruman tried to give her side of the story, but Muhammad retorted, “So what?” Aisha’s mother had to promise never to annoy her daughter again.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> As the important details have been omitted from this story, it is difficult to discern whether it was Umm Ruman who was an overbearing mother or Aisha who was a bratty child, or even whether it was Abu Bakr who abused both of them; but it is certain that Muhammad was interfering with another family’s affairs without any interest in knowing all the facts.
Muhammad told the household of Abu Bakr, without mentioning his reason, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position.” A few days later, Aisha became upset with her mother and complained to her father. Abu Bakr was angry with both of them, and Umm Ruman vented her annoyance on Aisha. Aisha hid behind the front door to sob and was in this state of distress when Muhammad, arriving for his daily visit, asked what was wrong. She blurted out everything. Muhammad immediately confronted Umm Ruman, saying, “Didn’t I tell you to look after Aisha for me?” Umm Ruman tried to give her side of the story, but Muhammad retorted, “So what?” Aisha’s mother had to promise never to annoy her daughter again.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> As the important details have been omitted from this story, it is difficult to discern whether it was Umm Ruman who was an overbearing mother or Aisha who was a bratty child, or even whether it was Abu Bakr who abused both of them; but it is certain that Muhammad was interfering with another family’s affairs without any interest in knowing all the facts.


Soon afterwards Muhammad made his formal request for Aisha’s hand. Abu Bakr hesitated at first, saying, “Would this be suitable, since she is like my brother’s daughter?” But Muhammad said that their brotherhood was purely spiritual and did not preclude such a marriage.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref> Abu Bakr had talked about betrothing Aisha to young Jubayr ibn Al-Mutim, but breaking off these negotiations proved easy, as the pagan family no longer wished to risk that their son might convert to Islam.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129-130}}.</ref> So Abu Bakr married Aisha to Muhammad in May or June 620.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|1|7|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|2|3309}}; {{Muslim|2|3310}}; {{Muslim|2|3311}}; {{Muslim|4|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref> Aisha did not know anything about it.<ref></ref>
Soon afterwards Muhammad made his formal request for Aisha’s hand. Abu Bakr hesitated at first, saying, “Would this be suitable, since she is like my brother’s daughter?” But Muhammad said that their brotherhood was purely spiritual and did not preclude such a marriage.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref> Abu Bakr had talked about betrothing Aisha to young Jubayr ibn Al-Mutim, but breaking off these negotiations proved easy, as the pagan family no longer wished to risk that their son might convert to Islam.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129-130}}.</ref> So Abu Bakr married Aisha to Muhammad in May or June 620.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|1|7|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|2|3309}}; {{Muslim|2|3310}}; {{Muslim|2|3311}}; {{Muslim|4|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref> Aisha did not know anything about it.<ref>REFERENCE MISSING</ref>


That Aisha did not know that she was married was, of course, nothing unusual. Throughout history and in nearly every culture, betrothals have been arranged over cradles, and women in particular have been married without their knowledge, understanding or consent. The fact that Aisha was a child is barely an issue here; no woman of ''any'' age should be married without her own consent, whether she is six, 16, 36 or 60. However, it is unlikely that any seventh-century Arab grasped “informed consent” in the way the modern West understands it. Muhammad’s similar failure to grasp it betrays that he was no prophet or pioneer of human rights but was simply a normal product of his own culture.
That Aisha did not know that she was married was, of course, nothing unusual. Throughout history and in nearly every culture, betrothals have been arranged over cradles, and women in particular have been married without their knowledge, understanding or consent. The fact that Aisha was a child is barely an issue here; no woman of ''any'' age should be married without her own consent, whether she is six, 16, 36 or 60. However, it is unlikely that any seventh-century Arab grasped “informed consent” in the way the modern West understands it. Muhammad’s similar failure to grasp it betrays that he was no prophet or pioneer of human rights but was simply a normal product of his own culture.


Muhammad’s intentions for Aisha seem to have been sexual from the beginning. “Abu Bakr was very averse to the giving him his daughter so young, but that Mohammed claimed a divine command for it; whereupon he sent her to him with a basket of dates, and when the girl was alone with him, he stretched out his blessed hand and rudely took hold of her clothes; upon which she looked fiercely at him, and said, “People call you The Faithful [Al-Amin], but your behaviour to me shows you are a faithless one.” And with these words she got out of his hands, and, composing her clothes, went and complained to her father. The old gentleman, to calm her resentment, told her she was new betrothed to Mohammed, and that made him take liberties with her, as if she had been his wife.”<ref>Abdulrahman al-Hamdani, ''Al-Shabayat'', cited by Maracci (1698). ''Vita Mohametus'', p. 23. A translation by Simon Ockley (1708) is here.)</ref> Although Aisha heard her father’s words, she did not really understand them, for she had no consciousness of being married to Muhammad until the day of the consummation.<ref></ref>
Muhammad’s intentions for Aisha seem to have been sexual from the beginning. “Abu Bakr was very averse to the giving him his daughter so young, but that Mohammed claimed a divine command for it; whereupon he sent her to him with a basket of dates, and when the girl was alone with him, he stretched out his blessed hand and rudely took hold of her clothes; upon which she looked fiercely at him, and said, “People call you The Faithful [Al-Amin], but your behaviour to me shows you are a faithless one.” And with these words she got out of his hands, and, composing her clothes, went and complained to her father. The old gentleman, to calm her resentment, told her she was new betrothed to Mohammed, and that made him take liberties with her, as if she had been his wife.”<ref>Abdulrahman al-Hamdani, ''Al-Shabayat'', cited by Maracci (1698). ''Vita Mohametus'', p. 23. A translation by Simon Ockley (1708) is here.)</ref> Although Aisha heard her father’s words, she did not really understand them, for she had no consciousness of being married to Muhammad until the day of the consummation.<ref>REFERENCE MISSING</ref>


Late in 622 Aisha accompanied her family on the emigration to Medina. She had an adventure on the way: “My camel broke loose. I was sitting in the ''howdah'' with my mother, and she started exclaiming, ‘Alas, my daughter! Alas, you bride!’ But they caught up with our camel after it had safely descended the Lift Valley.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172}).</ref> After the scorching heat of Mecca, the emigrants found Medina an uncongenially damp, cool climate, and several of them were struck by fever. Aisha was bemused by the delirious ramblings of two of Abu Bakr’s servants and asked Muhammad what it meant.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 413-414.</ref> Then Aisha herself became feverish for a whole month, and her hair fell out.<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876.</ref>
Late in 622 Aisha accompanied her family on the emigration to Medina. She had an adventure on the way: “My camel broke loose. I was sitting in the ''howdah'' with my mother, and she started exclaiming, ‘Alas, my daughter! Alas, you bride!’ But they caught up with our camel after it had safely descended the Lift Valley.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172}).</ref> After the scorching heat of Mecca, the emigrants found Medina an uncongenially damp, cool climate, and several of them were struck by fever. Aisha was bemused by the delirious ramblings of two of Abu Bakr’s servants and asked Muhammad what it meant.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 413-414.</ref> Then Aisha herself became feverish for a whole month, and her hair fell out.<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876.</ref>

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