Muhammad's Marriages: Difference between revisions

→‎Hind (Umm Salama) bint Abi Umayya: Found the hadith. Glad to be wrong. Argument now stronger.
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(→‎Hind (Umm Salama) bint Abi Umayya: Found the hadith. Glad to be wrong. Argument now stronger.)
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Hind was born into the wealthy Makhzum clan of the Quraysh, and her husband, Abdullah ibn Abdulasad, was a second cousin from the same clan.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 132}}.</ref> Since their family rejected them when they became Muslims,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 169, 170.</ref> it is not clear whether they were still wealthy when, ten years later, they arrived in Medina; but they owned the camels that transported them.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 213-214.</ref>
Hind was born into the wealthy Makhzum clan of the Quraysh, and her husband, Abdullah ibn Abdulasad, was a second cousin from the same clan.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 132}}.</ref> Since their family rejected them when they became Muslims,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 169, 170.</ref> it is not clear whether they were still wealthy when, ten years later, they arrived in Medina; but they owned the camels that transported them.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 213-214.</ref>


Abdullah died from battle wounds in November 625.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 175}}; Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> Hind wanted to pledge never to remarry so that they might be reunited in Paradise; but the dying Abdullah would not accept the pledge.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:62.</ref> The very fact that Hind believed she would not want to remarry suggests that she was not worried about poverty. It is quite possible that Abdullah had some savings to leave to his widow. She was pregnant,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:66: “When I gave birth to Zaynab, the Messenger of Allah came and proposed to me.” There is some confusion here, as both Hind's daughters appear to have been sometimes known as Zaynab, although the first was originally named Barra and the second Durra. Obviously, Hind is here referring to her younger daughter.</ref> so if she needed to generate more income, perhaps she planned to hire herself out as a wet nurse.
Abdullah died from battle wounds in November 625.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 175}}; Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> Hind wanted to pledge never to remarry so that they might be reunited in Paradise; but the dying Abdullah would not accept the pledge.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:62.</ref> The very fact that Hind believed she would not want to remarry suggests that she was not worried about poverty. It is quite possible that Abdullah had some savings to leave to his widow. She was pregnant,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:66: “When I gave birth to Zaynab, the Messenger of Allah came and proposed to me.” There is some confusion here, as both Hind's daughters appear to have been sometimes known as Zaynab, although the first was originally named Barrah and the second Durrah. Obviously, Hind is here referring to her younger daughter.</ref> so if she needed to generate extra income, perhaps she planned to hire herself out as a wet nurse. However, neither of these options was her main plan.


As an aside, it is sometimes stated that Hind was a tanner. Muslim websites include such statements as: “Khadija and Umm Salama ran their own businesses, Khadija in trade and Umm Salama selling crafts,”<ref>[http://www.wisemuslimwomen.org/resources/protectingwealth/ “Protecting and Promoting Religion” in ''WISE''.]</ref> and, “Umm Salamah, one of the wives of the Prophet also processed leather.<ref>[http://www.lastprophet.info/zaynab-bint-jahsh-wife-of-the-prophet-and-mother-of-the-believers/ Zaynab bint Jahsh: Wife of the Prophet and Mother of the Believers” in ''lastprophet.info''.]</ref> This seems to be because the name ''Umm Salama'' literally means “mother of tanning”. But there is no other evidence that she ever worked in the trade. On the contrary, she was the mother of an actual son named Salama,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61: “There she bore him Zaynab. After that she bore him Salama, Umar and Durra.”</ref> so the name was a true ''kunya'' and not a nickname or by-name.
As soon as Hind was free to remarry (18 March 626)<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> she received a marriage-proposal from Abu Bakr. Then she received a proposal from Umar. Then she received a proposal from Muhammad. She refused all of them. Muhammad then came to visit in person.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63.</ref> In Hind’s own words: “When my ''idda'' was over, Allah’s Messenger asked to come to see me '''while I was tanning a hide I had. I washed my hands clean of the tanning solution''' and asked him to come in ...”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, cited in Ibn Kathir, ''Al-Sira Al-Nabawiyya''. Translated by Le Gassick T. (2000). ''The Life of the Prophet'', p. 123. Reading, U.K.: Garnet Publishing.</ref> Like Sawdah, Hind was a tanner. Muhammad happened to call on her while she was in the very act of working to support her children, which suggests that she had long since established the routine on which they would all depend.


As soon as Hind was free to remarry (18 March 626)<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> she received a marriage-proposal from Abu Bakr. Then she received a proposal from Umar. Then she received a proposal from Muhammad. She refused all of them.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63.</ref> Muhammad had to argue her out of her excuses and propose a second time before she finally accepted him.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63.</ref> They were married on or before 6 April 626.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> Hind’s reluctance to remarry indicates that she was managing quite well on her own.
When Muhammad repeated his marriage-proposal, Hind gave him a string of reasons for why she wanted to refuse, and he left her house disappointed. Muhammad had to argue her out of her excuses and propose a third time before she finally accepted him.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63.</ref> They were married on or before 6 April 626.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> Of course, this raises the question of whether Hind truly wanted to marry Muhammad or whether she simply gave in to the pressure from the most powerful man in the community. Regardless of why she changed her mind, her on-principle reluctance to remarry indicates that she had been managing quite well on her own.
 
Her exact financial situation is unknown. It is possible that she was financially straitened; it is also possible that her first husband had left her in comfort. But her actions prove that she was not destitute.


===Zaynab bint Jahsh===
===Zaynab bint Jahsh===