'Iddah (Female Menstrual Waiting Period): Difference between revisions

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In Islam, 'iddah or 'iddat (Arabic: العدة‎; ''period (of waiting)'') is the period a woman must observe after the death of her husband or after a divorce, during which she may not marry another man.<ref name="Esposito2004">{{cite book | editor = John L. Esposito | date = 21 October 2004 | title = The Oxford Dictionary of Islam | publisher = Oxford University Press | pages = 131 | isbn = 978-0-19-975726-8 | oclc = 286438886 | url = https://books.google.com/books?id=E324pQEEQQcC}}</ref> The 'iddah (waiting period) of different kind of women in Islam varies depending on her status:
In Islamic [[Sharia]], '<nowiki/>''iddah'' or '''iddat'' (Arabic: العدة‎; ''period (of waiting)''), also spelled ''iddah'', ''idda'', or ''iddat'', is the period a woman must observe after the death of her husband or after a divorce, during which she has to face numbers of restrictions<ref name="Esposito2004">{{cite book | editor = John L. Esposito | date = 21 October 2004 | title = The Oxford Dictionary of Islam | publisher = Oxford University Press | pages = 131 | isbn = 978-0-19-975726-8 | oclc = 286438886 | url = https://books.google.com/books?id=E324pQEEQQcC}}</ref>.
 
The 'iddah (waiting period) of different kind of women in Islam varies depending on her status:


*'''A widowed woman''': The waiting period is 4 months and 10 days
*'''A widowed woman''': The waiting period is 4 months and 10 days
*'''A pregnant woman''': The waiting period is up to 9 months (till the birth of the baby)
*'''A pregnant woman''': The waiting period is up to 9 months (till the birth of the baby)
*'''A divorced woman''': The waiting period is 3 menstrual cycles. (However, Islam critics point out that actually she would not get the attention and love and emotional help from any man for 6 menstrual cycles. The first 3 menstrual cycles are the process of Divorce, in which she could not leave the husband's house, and her husband does not touch her. And after the divorce, again she has to stay in the "waiting period" of 3 more menstrual cycles with many restrictions. She practically has to stay under these strict restrictions for about 6 months).
*'''A divorced woman''': The waiting period is 3 menstrual cycles.


Muslim Scholars claim that rulings of 'Iddah could neither be abolished, nor could be changed as the rulings of the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sharia Islamic Sharia]  are based upon wisdom, justice and the best interests of the women, and they protect the women against the gender oppression and misogyny, while the man made laws of the modern Western world lead to the sexual exploitation of the women<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/39286 Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website: Is it correct to think that fatwas may vary according to time and place?] </ref><ref>[https://yaqeeninstitute.org/read/paper/women-in-islamic-law-examining-five-prevalent-myths Women in Islamic Law: Examining Five Prevalent Myths]</ref>.
Muslim scholars defend these restrictions upon the women in 'Iddah. They claim that rulings of 'Iddah could neither be abolished, nor could they be changed as the rulings of the [[Shari'ah (Islamic Law)| Islamic Sharia]]  are based upon wisdom, justice and the best interests of the women, and they protect the women against the gender oppression and misogyny, while the man made laws of the modern Western world lead to the sexual exploitation of the women<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/39286 Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website: Is it correct to think that fatwas may vary according to time and place?] </ref><ref>[https://yaqeeninstitute.org/read/paper/women-in-islamic-law-examining-five-prevalent-myths Women in Islamic Law: Examining Five Prevalent Myths]</ref>. Yet in point of fact women are forced to unilaterally face these restrictions, which make their life difficult, while the husbands don't have to face any restriction. The basis of these restrictions, the need to be sure of fatherhood, has been rendered obsolete by modern science. In addition, these restrictions are not found anywhere in the bible or Judeo-Christian tradition. Their antecedents seem rather to be pre-Islamic Arab culture (which is known as "Time of Ignorance (i.e. jāhiliyyah)"<ref>[https://www.al-islam.org/man-and-ignorance/what-does-jahiliyah-mean What does Jahiliyah mean?]</ref>.
==The different lengths of the waiting periods and their reasons==
The length of 'iddah (waiting period) of different kind of women in Islam varies depending on her status: 


While Islam critics claim that:  
*'''A prisoner/slave woman''': The waiting period is becoming free from the blood of the first menstrual cycle<ref name=":3">[https://web.archive.org/web/20201219104233/https://www.iium.edu.my/deed/lawbase/risalah_maliki/book33.html 'Idda, Istibra' and Maintenance]</ref>. The reason is to determine the parentage of the child. Islam considers first menstrual cycle as enough to determine if a woman is pregnant or not.
*'''A divorced woman''': The waiting period is 3 menstrual cycles. The reason is to make sure she's not pregnant before she can marry another man and to give time to the couple to solve their dispute during this period<ref name=":3" /><ref name=":0">[https://brill.com/view/book/9789047426202/Bej.9789004172739.i-227_018.xml Reason for the waiting period]</ref>.
*'''A widowed woman''': The waiting period is 4 months and 10 days. The reason is to make sure she's not pregnant before she can marry another man and to give time to the woman to mourn the death of her husband<ref name=":3" /><ref name=":0" />.
*'''A pregnant woman''': The waiting period is up to 9 months (till the birth of the baby). The reason is to prevent that another man (as 2nd husband) could "water" the unborn child from the previous husband<ref name=":3" /><ref>[https://quranx.com/Hadith/AbuDawud/DarusSalam/Hadith-2158/ Sunnan Abu Dawud, Hadith 2158]</ref>.


*'Iddah rulings are illogical, and thus they have contradictions.
==Islamic Divorce and The 'Idaah==
*And all these restrictions of 'Iddah are only targeting the women and only women have to suffer unilaterally, while men are totally free to enjoy their life.
An important factor in Islamic divorce is whether the husband has declared the divorce for three times or less.


==‘Iddah and the ‘parentage’ of the child==
'''The case of a single or a double divorce:'''
Islam advocates claim that ‘Iddah is necessary in order to keep the ‘parentage’ of the child safe.


But the Islam critics object ,and present the following arguments:
If the husband says to his wife, once or twice, that he has divorces her, then she begins her 'Iddah period which lasts for three menstrual cycles. During this period, she’s still formally considered to be his wife: He’s obliged to house her and provide for her and they both can inherit from one another in case of death. During the Iddah, the husband can cancel the divorce even without her approval by saying that he's taken her back to him or by having sex with her. But if the 'Iddah period passes without any of these two events, then she’s formally divorced.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1034 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.274]</ref> After that, if the husband wishes to remarry her, he needs a new marriage contract, two witnesses, to pay the [[Mahr (Marital Price)]] and he also needs her approval.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1037 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.277]</ref>


*Becoming free of blood of the first menstrual cycle is enough to know if the woman is pregnant or not, and about the “parentage” of the child.
*That is why Islam itself stipulated the ‘Iddah (waiting period) of only one menstrual cycle for the prisoner/slave woman<ref>[https://sunnah.com/abudawud:2158 Sunnan Abu Dawud: 2158]</ref>, and also of a free Muslim woman who takes divorce through [[Khul']]<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/5163/does-iddah-apply-in-the-case-of-khula Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website]</ref>.
*After this first menstrual cycle, Muslim men are allowed to have sex with them.
*Muhammad himself had sex with Saffiyah the same night, when in the day her father, brother and husband was killed, while she became free from blood of her first menstrual cycle the same day<ref>[https://sunnah.com/bukhari/64/251 Sahih Bukhari:2158]</ref>. Muhammad married her as a free woman.
*Thus 3 monthly cycle 'Iddah of divorced woman, or 4 months 10 days 'Iddah of a widow, or the birth of child in case of pregnant woman has nothing to do with the parentage of the child.


==Restrictions upon the women during 'Iddah:==
'''The case of a triple divorce:'''


===First Restriction: She has to undergo the 'Iddah even without any 'maintenance' money===
If the husband declares the divorce for three times, by saying “I have divorced you, I have divorced you, I have divorced you”, then the woman is no longer considered to be his wife.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1027 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.267,269]</ref> She enters her 'Iddah period which lasts for three menstrual cycles. The husband cannot remarry her unless she marries another man and gets divorced again.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1037 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.277]</ref> This is based on the following Hadith from Sahih Bukhari:{{Quote|[https://sunnah.com/bukhari:5260 Sahih al-Bukhari 5260]|The wife of Rifa`a Al-Qurazi came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger! Rifa`a divorced me irrevocably. After him I married `Abdur-Rahman bin Az-Zubair Al-Qurazi who proved to be impotent." Allah's Messenger said to her, "Perhaps you want to return to Rifa`a? Nay (you cannot return to Rifa`a) until you and `Abdur-Rahman consummate your marriage."}}
{{Quote|[https://daruliftaa.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/rules_of_iddat-1.pdf Dar-ul-Ifta]|The '''maintenance and providing of shelter for a woman observing the Iddat of Death are not the responsibility of her in-laws. She also does not have the right to take her maintenance out of the Estate of her deceased husband.'''}}
Thus Islam Critics point out that:


*A woman has no choice, but to compulsorily undergo the 'Iddah of period of 4 months and 10 days (or up to 9 months in case of pregnancy), but she has no right for maintenance money from the estate of her husband for this long period of time.
*This is a huge financial burden upon the women, who often don't even have any source of income in the Islamic countries.


===Second Restriction: She has to obligatorily stay only in the house of Husband during the ‘Iddah===
In summary, if the husband declares divorce once or twice and doesn't cancel the divorce during her waiting period, his wife is formally divorced and he needs a new marriage contract to remarry her. But if the husband declares divorce thrice then his wife is immediately considered to be formally divorced regardless of her waiting period, and the husband cannot remarry his triple-talaq divorced wife unless she marries another man and gets divorced by him. 
According to the Islamic Sharia'h, If the husband dies:


*then a woman has to stay ONLY in the house of her husband during this whole period of 'Iddah.
Triple-talaq divorce in one sitting proved to be problematic:
*She is not allowed to spend this time of 'Iddah in any other place (like house of her parents or any other family members)<ref>Fatwas Website Islamqa.Org. [https://web.archive.org/web/20211028112250/https://islamqa.org/hanafi/askmufti/45291/laws-of-the-iddat/ Laws of Iddat].</ref><ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/10670/what-a-recently-widowed-woman-is-not-allowed-to-do Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website]</ref>.


Islam critics object here that:
1- In one moment of anger, a husband could end the marriage and the family by saying a triple divorce, and the literature is clear that his remorse or regret does not invalidate the triple-talaq.


*What does that have to do with the ‘parentage’ of the child where she stays after the death of her husband?
2- Triple divorce led to the spread of a fake kind of marriage where a divorced woman is married to another man only for him to immediately divorce her so that she can return to her original husband. This practice is called Nikah Al-Tahlil نكاح التحليل. <ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1031 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.271 footnote.1]</ref>
*Why could she not spend the waiting period in the house of her parents, where she feels comfortable and where she is among the people who love her? This could help her immensely to come out of the sorrow of the death of her husband.
*And in the house of her husband, she could be all alone, and she has to live like she is in a 'solitary confinement' like situation, while she is not allowed to leave the house, and she could not come in contact with any man.
*Moreover, it could be a huge mental torture for many women to live for 4 long months (or upto 9 months in case of pregnancy) in the house where their husbands died.


===She has to stay in the husband’s house, even if it doesn’t belong to her husband, or even if he hasn’t left any maintenance money for the wife===
This triple divorce in one sitting is considered valid by most classical scholars and by the four traditional Sunni schools of Islamic jurisprudence.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1029 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.269]</ref>
{{Quote|{{Abudawud||2293|hasan}}|Furay'ah said that she came to the Messenger of Allah and asked him whether she could return to her people, Banu Khidrah, for her husband went out seeking his slaves who ran away. When they met him at al-Qudum, they murdered him.


So I asked the Messenger of Allah: "Should I return to my people, '''for he did not leave any dwelling house of his own and maintenance for me'''?
Ibn Taymiyah (d.1328) was the one who popularized the minority opinion which says that a triple repition of the word divorce (talaaq طلاق) in one sitting counts only as one divorce. And for that opinion, Ibn Taymiyah was accused of breaking the consensus and he was sent to prison.<ref>Daf’ Shubah by Taqiy Al-Din Al-Hisni, Dar Al-Mustafa, p.271


She said: The Messenger of Allah replied: Yes. She said: I came out, and when I was in the apartment or in the mosque, he called for me, or he commanded (someone to call me) and, therefore, I was called.
دفع شبه من شبَّه وتمرد لتقي الدين الحصني، دار المصطفى، ص271</ref> Despite the opposition to this at the time, Ibn Taymiya’s opinion is the popular one in the Muslim world today.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1031 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.271]</ref><ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/7692/41 Al-Bid’ah Wa Atharuha by Abu Ishaq Al-Huwayni, Al-Shamilah library, vol.5 p.13]</ref>


He said: what did you say? So I repeated my story which I had already mentioned about my husband.
Another opinion of Ibn Taymiyah which was adopted by prominent Saudi scholars Ibn Baz and Ibn Uthaymin is that in a single menstrual cycle only one divorce counts<ref>[https://www.islamweb.net/ar/fatwa/110547/%D9%85%D8%B0%D8%A7%D9%87%D8%A8-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%B9%D9%84%D9%85%D8%A7%D8%A1-%D9%81%D9%8A%D9%85%D9%86-%D8%B7%D9%84%D9%82-%D8%B2%D9%88%D8%AC%D8%AA%D9%87-%D9%81%D9%8A-%D8%B7%D9%87%D8%B1-%D8%AC%D8%A7%D9%85%D8%B9%D9%87%D8%A7-%D9%81%D9%8A%D9%87 Islamweb.net Fatwa no.110547]</ref>. This would imply that for the husband to initiate a triple-talaq divorce he needs to declare divorce once in the each of the three menstrual cycles of the 'Iddah period.  


'''Thereupon he said: Stay in your house till the term (of four months and 10 days) lapses.'''
==The rights and the restrictions during the 'Iddah==
<big>'''1-'''</big> '''<big>The</big> <big>case of a single or a double-talaq divorce (by saying “I divorce you” once or twice, in one sitting or two different sittings)</big>'''  


She said: So I passed my waiting period in it (her house) for four months and ten days. When Uthman ibn Affan became caliph, he sent for me and asked me about that; so I informed him, '''and he followed it and decided cases accordingly'''.}}
This case is the best for the divorced wife in terms of her rights since she’s considered to be married to her husband until the waiting period is over. During the waiting period, scholars unanimously agree that the husband is obliged to house his wife and provide for her.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1097 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.337]</ref> If the waiting period ends without the husband canceling the divorce, then she’s no longer considered to be his wife.


Thus Islam Critics raise the objections that:
The wife cannot leave the husband’s house during the waiting period. The four mainstream schools of Sunni Islamic jurisprudence have the following opinions on the right of leaving the house during the waiting period of a woman divorced with less than three divorce announcements:


*How is it a 'justice' with a woman that firstly she is compelled to live in that house, and secondly then also to pay for the rent?
'''The Hanafi and the Shafi’i schools:''' She cannot leave her husband’s house neither during the day nor the night.
*Why is she compelled to bear the expenses of her daily needs at her own, while her family could have taken care of her easily if she would have stayed in the house of her parents/brothers/sisters.


===Third Restriction: She could not leave the house even for daily walks, or visit the relatives or attend any social gathering===
'''The Hanbali and the Maliki schools:''' She can leave the house during the day for her daily needs. But she cannot leave during the night because it’s the time when adultery is feared.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/11430/18733 The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.348,349]</ref>
{{Quote|[https://web.archive.org/web/20211014113704/https://islamqa.org/hanafi/askmufti/45453/visiting-relatives-in-iddat/ IslamQA Fatwa Website]|'''Question''': Is a woman allowed to visit family members like her parents or sisters if she is observing iddat and use the excuse that she will be with her family so she doesn’t  see the problem?</br>
'''Answer''': A woman who has been divorced is not allowed to leave the confines of her home during the iddat for whatever reason, '''be it to visit friends or relatives or to attend the funeral of even her parents'''.}}
She could also not go outside for daily walks, as they are not a necessity ([https://web.archive.org/web/20211014114224/https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/349861/woman-in-iddah-may-go-out-for-need Fatwa 1], [https://web.archive.org/web/20211014114300/https://idealwoman.org/2021/can-a-woman-go-out-for-a-walk-during-iddat/ Fatwa 2]).


Islam Critics object that: 


*Women are also human beings. They thus also need to entertain themselves by going out in the parks, and daily walks, and shopping, and eating in restaurants, attending the parties, sleeping at her parents house, visiting her relatives etc.
'''<big>2- The case of a triple-talaq divorce (The husband says “I divorce you” three times in one sitting or multiple sittings).</big>'''
*All these restrictions are non-Natural and against the human nature.
*And putting these restrictions 'unilaterally' only upon the women does not constitute to 'doing Justice with the women'.
*These restrictions are draconian, and practically putting a woman in a 'solitary confinement' like situation.


===Fourth Restriction: She could not even use collyrium/kohl in eyes despite eye disease, while it beautifies her===
The four schools of Islamic jurisprudence have different views:
Although a woman is allowed to take medical care during ‘Iddah, still she should not use collyrium/kohl as a cure even against any eye disease, while it beautifies her.


{{Quote|{{Bukhari||68|81|in-book}}|Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply  collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said, "No."}}
'''The Hanafi school:''' The husband is obliged to house his triple-talaq divorced wife and provide for her.


===Fifth Restriction: Women are not allowed to use good clothes, jewelry, perfume, Henna and to comb the hairs or to oil them===
'''The Hanbali school:''' The husband isn’t obliged to house her nor provide for her in the case of triple-talaq.
Women in 'Iddah are not allowed to wear good clothes, or jewelry, or use perfume or Henna. Even combing hairs and applying the oil to them is also forbidden<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20211028112250/https://islamqa.org/hanafi/askmufti/45291/laws-of-the-iddat/ IslamQA Fatwa Website]</ref>. And even washing the face with aloe is also forbidden.
{{Quote|[https://sunnah.com/mishkat:3333 Mishkat al-Masabih 3333]|Umm Salama said: God’s Messenger came to visit me when Abu Salama died, and I had put the juice of aloes on myself. He asked me what it was, and I told him it was only the juice of aloes and contained no perfume, so he said, “It gives the face a glow, so apply it only at night and remove it in the daytime, and do not comb yourself with scent or henna, for it is a dye.” I asked God’s Messenger what I should use when combing myself, and he told me to use lote-tree leaves and smear my head copiously with them. Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani declared this Hadith to be FAIR (حسن) (link).}}Islam critics question here the Islamic logic, that:


*A woman is not coming in any kind of contact with any man during the 'iddah, as she is not allowed to let any non-Mahram man to enter her house, and she is herself not allowed to leave the house.
'''The Shafi’i and the Maliki schools''': The husband is obliged to house her but not obliged to provide for her except in case she’s pregnant; the husband here is obliged to provide for her until she gives birth.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/9486/1097 Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.337]</ref>
*So, what is wrong if she wear good clothes, and jewelry, and use perfume, and use henna and comb her hairs with oil, and wash her face with aloe in the house, where she is alone, or at maximum with other women?
*At maximum, the usage of perfume could be restricted in case if she had to leave the house in urgent situation.


===Sixth Restriction: She should give up her Natural needs of getting any emotional support and attention and love from any other partner during the ‘Iddah===
As for the right of leaving the house during the waiting period of a triply divorced woman, the Maliki, Shafi’i and Hanbali schools say that she can leave the house during the day for her daily needs, but she can’t leave during the night, while the Hanafi school says she cannot leave not in the day nor in the night.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/11430/18735 The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.349,350]</ref>
Islam critics point out that:  


*Need of sex is not only limited to men, but it is a natural need of woman too. But Islam does not recognise this right and natural need of a woman, and it has limited it to the man only. Thus, a woman is not allowed to have sex with any partner for this long period of time of ‘Iddah.
'''<big>Fatwa from Islam q&a:</big>'''{{Quote|[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/73408/what-should-the-woman-who-is-revocably-divorced-avoid-and-what-should-she-avoid-if-she-is-irrevocably-divorced Islamqa.info fatwa no.73408]|If the husband has divorced her with a first or second talaaq (divorce announcement), it is not permissible for her to go out of her house during her ‘iddah, and it is not permissible for him to throw her out until her ‘iddah is over, whereupon she becomes a non-mahram for him. The reason for that is that perhaps he may decide to take her back, which is what Islam encourages. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
*But sex is not the only problem, while divorce or death of husband also comes with extreme emotional stress for the woman. This is exactly the time when some of them may need emotional support and attention from a caring partner the most, who could talk with them and give them love and attention, so that they feel themselves “secure” in the partner's arms.
*On the other hand, Muslim men are allowed to have sex with other wives and dozens of slave-girls the same night. There is absolutely no restrictions upon them to even control themselves for even for a single day.


===Seventh Restriction: She could not secure herself and her children financially through relationship with any other partner in the ‘Iddah===
“And turn them not out of their (husband’s) homes nor shall they (themselves) leave, except in case they are guilty of some open illegal sexual intercourse. And those are the set limits of Allaah. And whosoever transgresses the set limits of Allaah, then indeed he has wronged himself. You (the one who divorces his wife) know not it may be that Allaah will afterward bring some new thing to pass (i.e. to return her back to you if that was the first or second divorce)”
Islam critics object here that the Hadith of Furay'ah (which has already been mentioned above) proves that a woman has to stay in the waiting period in the house of her deceased husband, even though he left no maintenance money for her.


*And women in Islamic society are poorly educated.
[al-Talaaq 65:1]
*And Islamic society also does not provide women with job opportunities too, but she has to face so many hurdles in doing a job outside.
*Thus, the best bet for such a divorced/widow Muslim woman (even if she is pregnant) is to get another partner and get herself and her children financially secured in this way.
*But Islam has also completely blocked this opportunity for the woman too. Neither other men are allowed to see her, nor to meet her and decide if they could come into the relationship, nor they could make any proposal to them.
*She is all alone during the ‘Iddah period to financially secure herself and her children.<br />


===Islam Advocates: Strict 'restrictions' are placed upon the divorced woman during the 'Iddah due to the danger of her indulging in a SIN===
During her ‘iddah, it is permissible for her to uncover in front of her husband and adorn herself for him, and for him to speak to her and be alone with her, but he does not have the right to have intercourse with her until after he has taken her back, or he has intercourse with her with the intention of taking her back.
But Islam critics don't agree with this excuse, while:


*If normal Muslim women (or even the virgin Muslim girls) are allowed to go outside to entertain themselves in the Parks, and for picnic, and attend the social gatherings, and visit their relatives, and sleep in their parent's home, and attend the funerals of their parents and they don't indulge into sin, why then a widow or a divorced woman will indulge in the sin for doing these same things?
If the husband has divorced his wife with the last of three talaaqs, or he has divorced her twice or once and her ‘iddah has ended, then she becomes a non-mahram for him and it is not permissible for him to be alone with her, to touch her or to look at her.}}
*And if normal Muslim women (or even the virgin Muslim girls) are allowed to use the Kohl in their eyes, and parfum, and comb their hairs, and use the jewelry, and to wear good clothes, and use henna, or to wash their faces with Aloe, and still they don't indulge into sin, why then a divorced woman or a widow will indulge in the sin for doing the same thing?


===Did Muhammad copy this practice of ‘Iddah from the pre-Islamic period of Ignorance?===
Islam critics claim that:


*Muhammad copied this ‘Iddah from the culture of people of Pre-Islam period of ignorance.
A widowed wife goes through additional mourning restrictions in her waiting period. The mourning restrictions are the avoidance of wearing perfume, beautiful clothes, and jewelry during the waiting period.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/11430/18742 The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.353,354]</ref> Many scholars say a formally divorced woman should go through the same mourning restrictions to mourn the loss of the blessing of marriage. The views of the four Sunni schools of jurisprudence  on this issue are as follows: The Hanafi school says a formally divorced woman has to mourn. The Maliki school says she doesn’t need to mourn, while each of the Shafi’i and the Hanbali schools are split on this issue.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/11430/768 The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.2 p.104]</ref>
*And when Muslim women protested upon it, then Muhammad told the women to happily accept all these Islamic restriction of waiting period without questioning them, as they last only for 4 months and 10 days, and while they had to stay in 'Iddah for complete one year in the pre-Islamic days.


And as a proof, Islam critics quote the following hadith:


{{Quote|{{Bukhari|||5336|darussalam}}|Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply  collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said,''' "No." Then Allah's Messenger added, "It is just a matter of four months and ten days. In the Pre-Islamic Period of ignorance a widow among you should throw a globe of dung when one year has elapsed (i.e. she had to stay in ‘Iddah for the whole one year)." '''}}Islam critics object that this reason (which was given by Muhammad in the above mentioned hadith) is illogical. An oppression does not become legal while it is on smaller scale than the previous larger scale oppression.
'''<big>3- The case of a widowed woman.</big>'''


==Reason for 'iddah of a widow==
During the waiting period which lasts for four months and ten days, the widow is obliged to stay in her home. She can leave during the day for her daily needs, but she can’t leave during the night.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/11430/18737 The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.350]</ref>
Islam advocates claim that reason for the 4 month and 10 days long 'iddah of a widow is to ''''mourn'''<nowiki/>' the death of the husband<ref>Reason for 4 months 10 days long Iddah of a widow [https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/88684/rights-of-a-deceased-husband-on-his-wife]</ref>.


While Islam critics object upon it while:
There’s disagreement between scholars on whether the widowed woman has the right to housing and maintenance out of her dead husband’s money and estate. The Hanafi and the Hanbali schools say she doesn’t have the right. The Maliki school says she has the right. While the Shafi’i school is split on this issue, with the prominent opinion saying she has the right. Those who say a widowed woman doesn’t have the right for housing and maintenance have based their opinion on:


*There is no obligation of any “mourning” upon a man if the wife dies. This makes it a double standard situation against the women.
1- A hadith where Muhammad says: “A (divorced) woman is entitled for housing and provision only if her husband can take her back (i.e. she isn’t triple-talaq divorced, or still in her 'Iddah in case of a single or a double divorce)."
*Husband is totally free to marry a new wife the same night.
*And he is also totally free to have sex with his other wives and dozens of slave girls the same night, and there is no restriction upon him in name of ‘mourning’.
*Only the woman is compelled to ‘mourn’ the death of her husband.
*Only she is deprived of her natural needs of having love with any partner in the name of ‘mourning’, and only she has to undergo the strickt restrictions of 'Iddah.


Moreover, Islamic critics also criticise Islamic Sharia, while it says that a widow has also to observe 'Iddah, even if <ref>Widow has to observe 'Iddah even if she never saw the husband after the marriage, or even if she is a small child. [https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/145179/the-waiting-period-of-an-old-woman-after-the-death-of-her-husband]</ref>:
2- The dead husband’s house and money belong to the heirs. The widowed wife is only entitled to her share of the inheritance.<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/11430/15354 The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.25 p.114-16]</ref>


*She has never seen his husband after the marriage.
*Or even if the marriage has not been consummated.
*Or even if she is a minor child.
*Islam critics thus question why should she mourn if she no emotional connection and love for him in her heart?
*What if the husband was abusive and he tortured her when he was alive, and thus she HATED him? This is  cruel to still compel a woman for such a long obligatorily waiting period, with so many restrictions.


Therefore, Islam critics point out that Islam could have left it upon the woman:
'''The mourning restrictions:'''


*That she could decide for herself if she loved her deceased husband or not.
Scholars unanimously agree that a widowed wife should mourn her husband during the waiting period. She mourns him by avoiding wearing perfume, beautiful clothes, and jewelry during her waiting period (4 months and 10 days).<ref>[https://al-maktaba.org/book/11430/18742 The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.353,354]</ref> 
*That she decides herself to mourn his death or not.
*That she decides how long she wants to mourn, and when she is ready for the new relationship.
*That she decides if living in her deceased husband’s house is causing her unnecessary mental stress or not.
*That she decides for herself if she needs the help and love of her parents and family or not by staying with them.
*Woman is not a “'''Brainless Creature'''”, who is unable to even decide for the matters which are only related to her and her personal life?


==Reason for the 'Iddah of a pregnant woman==
'''Fatwa from Islam Q&A:'''{{Quote|[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/13966/things-which-it-is-forbidden-for-a-woman-to-do-at-the-time-of-mourning Islamqa.info Fatwa no. 13966]|It is forbidden for a woman at the time of mourning to do the following:
According to the Quran, the waiting period of a pregnant woman is till the birth of a child ([https://quranx.com/65.4 Quran 65:4]).


And then Muhammad further told the '''Scientific LOGIC''' behind this Quranic order:
1 – To go out of her house, except for a necessary purpose, such as if she is sick and needs to go to the hospital, in which case she should go during the day; or in the case of emergencies such as if her house is about to fall down and there is the fear that it may collapse on top of her; or in the case of fire; and so on.
{{Quote|{{Abudawud||2158|darussalam}}|The Messenger of Allah said: It is not lawful for a man who believes in Allah and the last day '''to water what another has sown with his water (meaning intercourse with a woman who is pregnant from her previous husband).'''}}
Islam critics objects that this is a scientific mistake, while:


*Science is very clear if woman has already become pregnant, then other man could do as much sex as possible, but his sperms are not going to have any effects upon the fetus (i.e. he is not going to water the fetus from previous man). No DNA changes are going to take place in the fetus due to the sex. These were the concepts of times of ignorance, and Muhammad took this concept from them.
The scholars said: she may go out during the day for necessary purposes, but at night she should not go out unless it is essential.


Moreover, Islam critics also points out that once again the pregnant woman has to bear the consequences of this practice unilaterally.  
2 – To wear perfume, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade the grieving woman to put on perfume except when she purifies herself following her period, in which case she may applies a little azfaar (a kind of perfume) after her period ends, to take away the traces of menstruation.


*The pregnant woman is alone after the death of her husband, and she is financially very weak.
3 – To wear beautiful clothes that are considered to be adornments, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade that. Rather she should wear ordinary clothes such as the kind that she usually wears inside her house, without making herself look beautiful.
*What if the deceased husband left no money for her and the baby?
*And it is impossible for her to go to the work outside while carrying the baby in her belly.
*A woman is in a state of extreme emotion during the pregnancy. This is exactly the time when she needs emotional support the most from a partner, who could take care of her, or of her father/mother/family, but she is compelled to stay at the husband's house.
*She is compelled to face all these difficulties 'alone' till the birth of the baby.


Moreover, Islam critics also point out that in principle:
4 – She should not put on kohl, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade that. If she needs to use it, she should use the kind of kohl whose colour is not obvious, putting it on at night and removing it during the day.


*A pregnant woman should not go for ‘Iddah of even a single day, while the parentage of the child is already known due to her pregnancy.
5 – She should not wear any jewellery, because if she is forbidden to wear beautiful clothes, it is more appropriate that jewellery should not be allowed.
*If husband could divorce such a pregnant woman and then start having sex with dozens of other slave girls and wives, why then should the pregnant woman be deprived of the emotional support and love and attention and care of the new partner, in a hard time when she needs these things the most?


==Reasons for the 'Iddah in case of divorce==
It is permissible for her to speak to men and to speak on the telephone, and to allow people to enter the house who are permitted to do so according to sharee’ah, and to go out onto the roof of the house during the night and during the day.}}
Islam critics point out that:


*The whole process of Divorce + ‘Iddah lasts for 6 menstrual cycles for a divorced woman.
==Restrictions upon the woman during her 'Iddah==
*If Muslim husband decides to give her a divorce, then woman is still compelled to stay for the next 3 menstrual cycles with him in his house<ref>Woman has to stay for 3 menstrual cycles at home of husband during the process of [https://abukhadeejah.com/divorce-talaq-iddah-remarriage-khula/ Talaq] </ref>.
Islamic 'Iddah not only prohibits the women from remarriage with another man, but it also puts other restrictions upon them. In the case of a widowed woman, she may face more restrictions than a formally divorced woman; yet jurists are split on whether a formally divorced woman should go through the same restrictions of a widowed woman.   
*During these 3 months, wife is not allowed to come in contact with any man. And her husband also does not touch her. She is again in a 'solitary confinement' like situation in the house of her husband.
*But the husband is free to have sex with other wives and slave girls during all this time.
*And after the divorce, she again has to undergo a waiting period of 3 more menstrual cycles<ref>'Iddah of 3 menstrual cycles after the divorce.[https://www.islamic-sharia.org/downloads/talaq/]</ref>But why?  There is no issue of parentage of the child either, while her husband didn’t touch her for the last 3 menstrual cycles. And there is no option of reunion of both of them after the divorce, till the time she undergoes the Quranic Halala. So, why is the woman then still forced to undergo solitary confinement like situation for the next 3 more months in the name of ‘Iddah?


===Islam Advocates: She has to observe 'Iddah while she was 'alone' with a man under one roof===
===First Restriction: She has to undergo the 'Iddah even without any 'maintenance' money===
Islam advocates say, even if the husband has not touched her for the last 3 menstrual cycles, still she has to observe restrictions of 'Iddah of 3 more months, while<ref>Privacy under one roof causes women to observe 'Iddah of 3 months. [https://daruliftaa.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/rules_of_iddat-1.pdf]</ref>:
Jurists are split on this issue with many saying that a widowed woman is not entitled to any support from the deceased husband's family or estate. Dar-ul-Ifta takes the following opinion:{{Quote|[https://daruliftaa.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/rules_of_iddat-1.pdf Dar-ul-Ifta]|The '''maintenance and providing of shelter for a woman observing the Iddat of Death are not the responsibility of her in-laws. She also does not have the right to take her maintenance out of the Estate of her deceased husband.'''}}A woman has no choice but to compulsorily undergo the 'Iddah of period of 4 months and 10 days (or up to 9 months in case of pregnancy), yet she has no right for maintenance money from the estate of her husband for this long period of time, and this in traditional cultures where women often rely upon men for their sustenance. In such cultures this stricture would be a huge financial burden upon the women, who often did not and do not even have any source of income.


*She was ‘alone’ with her previous husband under one roof in privacy during the process of 3 Talaqs.
===Second Restriction: She has to stay in the house of her ex-Husband during the entirety of the ‘Iddah===
*And the WITNESSES of man and woman are not accepted in Islam that they didn’t have sex during this period.
If a woman's husband dies then she is allowed to stay ''only'' in the house of her husband during this whole period of 'Iddah. She is not allowed to spend this time of 'Iddah in any other place (like house of her parents or any other family members).<ref>Fatwas Website Islamqa.Org. [https://web.archive.org/web/20211028112250/https://islamqa.org/hanafi/askmufti/45291/laws-of-the-iddat/ Laws of Iddat].</ref><ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/10670/what-a-recently-widowed-woman-is-not-allowed-to-do Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website]</ref>  A Hadith recorded in Sunan Abu Dawud bears witness to this custom, and further clarifies that her need for financial support is not to be taken into consideration. It should be noted though that jurists are split on whether a triply divorced woman or a widowed woman has the right for financial support and housing. The following Hadith, classified as authentic by Al-Albani, shows that a widowed woman has to stay in the husband’s house, even if it doesn’t belong to her husband, or even if he hasn’t left any maintenance money for the wife
*Therefore, restrictions of 'Iddah of 3 more menstrual cycles will safeguard the parentage of the child in case she became pregnant from the previous husband.
{{Quote|{{Abudawud||2293|hasan}}|Furay'ah said that she came to the Messenger of Allah and asked him whether she could return to her people, Banu Khidrah, for her husband went out seeking his slaves who ran away. When they met him at al-Qudum, they murdered him.


But the Islam critics object and point out that:
So I asked the Messenger of Allah: "Should I return to my people, '''for he did not leave any dwelling house of his own and maintenance for me'''?


*If the witness of ONLY man is accepted in the process of Talaq (i.e. he didn’t touch her for the last 3 menstrual cycles), and he gets her divorced on the bases of his single witness, why then the witnesses of BOTH the Man and Woman are rejected when they testify that they didn’t have the sex for the last 3 menstrual cycles, and thus she is not pregnant, and thus she does not need any further ‘Iddah in name of parentage of the child?
She said: The Messenger of Allah replied: Yes. She said: I came out, and when I was in the apartment or in the mosque, he called for me, or he commanded (someone to call me) and, therefore, I was called.
*As compared to the rejection of witnesses of these 2 Free Adult Muslim Man and Woman, Islam allows the man to start having sex with the slave woman of another person, on the bases of ''''singular testimony'''<nowiki/>' of the slave-girl alone, that she is not pregnant, and her owner made her Halal for him to use her as a sex object.
{{Quote|[https://web.archive.org/web/20201101155533/http://www.shiapen.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/fatwa_alamgiri_v3_p268.jpg Fatawa Alamgiri, vol 3, page 268, Urdu edition]|A Singular Report is enough in the religious issues. Therefore, if a slave woman comes to any person and tells him that her master has gifted her to him, then that person could trust the testimony of that slave-girl and have sex with her.}}


*And lastly, even one menstrual cycle is enough to know if she is pregnant or not (just like the prisoner/slave woman). Why then she still has to undergo the 3 menstrual cycles long waiting period? This again makes no sense.
He said: what did you say? So I repeated my story which I had already mentioned about my husband.
*And why should she not use perfume and make-up and make herself attractive to other men, as there is no option of returning to previous husband without the Halala?


Moreover:
'''Thereupon he said: Stay in your house till the term (of four months and 10 days) lapses.'''


*A wife who hasn't seen her husband for years, should also undergo the sufferings of 'Iddah in case of divorce. But why? There are no chances of her being pregnant.
She said: So I passed my waiting period in it (her house) for four months and ten days. When Uthman ibn Affan became caliph, he sent for me and asked me about that; so I informed him, '''and he followed it and decided cases accordingly'''.}}
*A minor girl (who has not started to menstruate), why then does she also have to undergo the waiting period of 3 months in case of divorce, as she couldn't even get pregnant?
*Similarly, an old woman could also not get pregnant, why then does also have to undergo the solitary confinement like restrictions of ‘Iddah in case of divorce?


===Islam Advocates: 'Iddah is necessary while a women is emotionally disturbed after the divorce===
Although this clearly serves the purpose of insuring that the next man who marries her does not inherit a son from the previous marriage or another man she had relations with during her 'Iddah, the wellbeing of the woman here is not considered at all; her need to either work to support herself or be with her own family for succor and support is not taken into account at all, and neither is her freedom of movement and intention.
An Islam advocate wrote:
{{Quote|1=[https://www.reddit.com/r/DebateReligion/comments/q8lp7y/comment/hgr5oij/?utm_source=reddit&utm_medium=web2x&context=3 Reddit]|2="The last thing on a woman's mind after she has got divorced is intimacy. She is mentally disturbed and needs time to come out of this shock"}}
While Islam critics point out that:


*The answer is simple, i.e. to let the women decide for themselves. If they don't have wish, then no one should force them into any relationship. And what to talk about 3 menstrual cycles of 'Iddah, they could stay out of any new relationship for an year or longer as they wish.
===Third Restriction: The Woman should not leave the house even for daily walks, or visit the relatives or attend any social gathering===
*But if they wish otherwise, and decide to enter into a new relationship just after the divorce (or even in case of becoming a widow), then no one should stop them. There could be many women for whom divorce is not a mental shock, but divorce is a form of  freedom for them and it is a ''''mental relief'''<nowiki/>' for them to come out of an abusive relationship.
{{Quote|[https://web.archive.org/web/20211014113704/https://islamqa.org/hanafi/askmufti/45453/visiting-relatives-in-iddat/ IslamQA Fatwa Website]|'''Question''': Is a woman allowed to visit family members like her parents or sisters if she is observing iddat and use the excuse that she will be with her family so she doesn’t  see the problem?</br>
*Why then religion want to forcefully imposes itself upon the masses, killing the wishes and the right of self-determination of millions of women.
'''Answer''': A woman who has been divorced is not allowed to leave the confines of her home during the iddat for whatever reason, '''be it to visit friends or relatives or to attend the funeral of even her parents'''.}}
*It would become double standards if the religion considers that men are not mentally disturbed from Talaq, and thus have the right to decide for themselves to have sex with multiple other slave women or wives the same night, or to take marry another wife same night, but only women are unable to decide for themselves.
Jurists agree that a woman observing her Iddah must not leave her house, with many jurists saying she can only leave for necessary needs. Many Islamic fatawa (religious rulings) decree that Muslim women observing their 'iddah must not leave their (husband's) house even for a walk and certainly not for any type of social gathering ([https://web.archive.org/web/20211014114224/https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/349861/woman-in-iddah-may-go-out-for-need Fatwa 1], [https://web.archive.org/web/20211014114300/https://idealwoman.org/2021/can-a-woman-go-out-for-a-walk-during-iddat/ Fatwa 2]). Although this makes sense from the perspective of insuring that her next husband does not inherit the baby of a man she had relations with during her 'iddah and that any pregnancy which comes about in the 'iddah can only be the work of her husband, it completely disregards her human rights. No consideration is given for the women's freedom of movement, freedom of choice, social or relationship needs.


Moreover:
===Fourth Restriction: The mourning woman should not even use collyrium/kohl on her eyes even for eye disease, since it beautifies her===
Although a woman is allowed to take medical care during her ‘iddah, still she should not use collyrium/kohl as a cure even against any eye disease, since this substance can be used as a form of makeup to beautifie her. According to many jurists, this restriction not only applies on a widowed woman, but it also applies to a formally divorced woman.


*Islam itself allowed the pregnant woman to deliver a child after divorce or becoming a widow (be it only few hours), and then immediately wed to another man. This proves that Islam itself doesn't consider that all women are necessarily mentally stressed, or emotionally attached with the previous husbands despite the divorce.
{{Quote|{{Bukhari||68|81|in-book}}|Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply  collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said, "No."}}
*Muhammad himself married Saffiyah the same night, when in the day her husband was killed, and Muhammad didn't care if she was mentally stressed or emotionally attached with her previous husband.  


==Islam Critics: The process of Divorce in Islam is again UNJUST towards the women==
===Fifth Restriction: Women are not allowed to use good clothes, jewelry, perfume, Henna and to comb their hair or to oil it===
Islam advocates claim that a woman has to stay in the house of husband for 3 menstrual cycles during the process of divorce, while this could provide them with the chance to reconcile<ref>Staying in husband's home during the process of divorce.[https://abukhadeejah.com/divorce-talaq-iddah-remarriage-khula/]</ref>.
Widowed women observing their 'Iddah are not allowed to wear good clothes, or jewelry, or use perfume or Henna. With some jurists saying that even combing their hair and applying the oil to it is forbidden<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20211028112250/https://islamqa.org/hanafi/askmufti/45291/laws-of-the-iddat/ IslamQA Fatwa Website]</ref>
{{Quote|[https://sunnah.com/mishkat:3333 Mishkat al-Masabih 3333]|Umm Salama said: God’s Messenger came to visit me when Abu Salama died, and I had put the juice of aloes on myself. He asked me what it was, and I told him it was only the juice of aloes and contained no perfume, so he said, “It gives the face a glow, so apply it only at night and remove it in the daytime, and do not comb yourself with scent or henna, for it is a dye.” I asked God’s Messenger what I should use when combing myself, and he told me to use lote-tree leaves and smear my head copiously with them. Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani declared this Hadith to be FAIR (حسن) (link).}}Although these strictures again work to keep the woman from having any intercourse or attracting any male attention during her 'iddah by keeping herself (relatively) unattractive, these laws once again completely disregard the happiness and freedom of the woman to whom they are applied. They also seem excessively harsh, as if she is truly keeping herself confined to her house the question arises as to who would see her with all of this makeup on even if she did apply it.  


But Islam critics object to this process of divorce, and ask:
==Pre-Islamic Influences on the Concept of ‘Iddah==
According to the following hadith, the concept of 'iddah was taken from pre-Islamic Arabian culture:


*But what if the husband is an abusive evil person? What if he tortures her all this period without any reason? What if he beats her so wildly that she gets bruises all over her body? Why they still she has to still stay with such an abusive husband for 3 months?  (Please read the [[Khul']] article, that woman could not get her freedom through Khul', even if the husband is abusive and tortures her. Only if he breaks any part of her body, in that case she could get her freedom through the court)
{{Quote|{{Bukhari|||5336|darussalam}}|Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply  collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said,''' "No." Then Allah's Messenger added, "It is just a matter of four months and ten days. In the Pre-Islamic Period of ignorance a widow among you should throw a globe of dung when one year has elapsed (i.e. she had to stay in ‘Iddah for the whole one year)." '''}}Apparently women even at the time the hadith was created were complaining of the burdens of the 'iddah, but the hadith admonishes them that they ought to be thankful for Islam, since in the jahiliyyah (the pre-islamic time of "ignorance" before the coming of Islam in the Arab peninsula) the 'iddah lasted a whole year. That there were complaints, though, can be seen from the existence of the hadith in the first place, so even in the time of this hadith women were not happy with them; by comparison, modern secular culture imposes no such restrictions on women at all.  
*Only the woman is forced to sacrifice in the name of so-called “reconcilement” in this Islamic Talaq process, while  husband has to bring no sacrifice. He is free to have sex with all other wives and slave girls during this whole period of 3 months.


Moreover:
==Waiting period for the captive/slave-women==
The waiting period of captive/slave-women is as follows:


*Is there any guarantee that this dispute between husband and wife is going to resolve in 3 months time of Talaq process?
*If she is a virgin girl, then no waiting period is necessary, and the Muslim owner is allowed to force her to provide him the sexual services the same night.
*Is it not possible that it may take more than 3 months that both of them come back in their senses and end the dispute after this period? For example, a man comes back to his senses after 1 years, and realises that it was a mistake to divorce his wife and she was totally innocent. Then what are the options available there to undo this mistake?  The answer is, there are NO more options available, while she could not return to him without undergoing the process of Halala, which is considered as a shameful process. So, what then is the 'Divine Wisdom' in this ruling, which limits this reconcilationary period to only 3 menstrual cycles?
*If she's married and has a husband, then the waiting period is to become free of the first menstrual blood. Even if this blood stopped the first night after the capture/purchase, the owner is allowed to force her to provide him the sexual services the same night.
{{Quote|{{Abudawud|11|2153}}|(Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said): ... it is not lawful for a man who believes in Allah and the Last Day to have intercourse with a captive woman till she is free from a menstrual course (i.e. her first menstrual blood).}}
Imam Abdullah Ibn Abi Zayd (who is also knows as younger Imam Malik), writes in his Fiqh book Risalah:
{{Quote|[http://web.archive.org/web/20160117184347/http://www.dhspriory.org/kenny/RISALA.htm Risalah by Imam Abdullah Ibn Abi Zayd]|واستبراء الامة في انتقال الملك حيضة انتقل الملك ببيع أو هبة أو سبي أو غير ذلك. ومن هي في حيازته قدحاضت عنده ثم إنه اشتراها فلا استبراء عليها إن لم تكن تخرج.</br>
The istibrā' (waiting) period for a slave concubine who changes ownership is one menstruation. Ownership may change by selling, giving away, capture, or any other way. If the woman menstruates after being taken possession of in advance by her new owner, and then he buys her, she does not have to go through a period of istibrā' (i.e. waiting period).}}
Even if the first menstrual blood stops the first night after becoming captive/purchase, the Muslim owner is allowed to have sex with her the same night.


Moreover:
Saffiyyah (a Jewish captive woman) became free of her blood the next night after her father, brother and husband were killed in the war by Muslims. Thus Muhammad had sex with her the next night
{{Quote|{{Bukhari|||4211|darussalam}}|Narrated Anas bin Malik:


*Islam compels the woman to stay in the house of husband during the process of Talaq. While it has been seen that in cases of disputes, it could also be helpful that both parties take a break from each other and live separately for some period of time.
We arrived at Khaibar, and when Allah helped His Apostle to open the fort, (then) the beauty of Safiya bint Huyai bin Akhtaq whose husband had been killed while she was a bride, was mentioned to Allah's Apostle. The Prophet (ﷺ) selected her for himself, and set out with her, and when we reached a place called Sidd-as-Sahba, (which is 14 miles away from Khaibar)' Safiya became clean from her menses then Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) married her.}}
*This provides both parties with chance to ponder upon, and to learn from their mistakes in a better way and they realise their mistakes in a better way.
*When wife has to face the difficulties in living in house of her parents or brothers/sisters, then she realises quickly the importance of house of her husband. And when husband has to do all the work in the house alone, and has to take care of the children alone too, then he also realises his mistake quickly.
*But Islam closed this option for them by ordering the woman for not leaving the husband's house even in case of serious disputes.


===Islam Critics: Pronouncing 3 Divorces in one sitting is also illogical and an Injustice towards the woman===
==Criticism of the Islamic 'Iddah==
Islam advocates say that Islam also allows pronouncing 3 divorces in one sitting, which will spare the woman of 3 months restrictions of divorce process. But Islam critics again object upon it and point out that:


*Only may is allowed to give Talaq in this way.  Why these double standards?  Is woman a 'brainless emotional creature', who could not take decisions about her own life.
===Criticism of the 'Iddah of a widow===
*And this divorce becomes valid even if the wife was totally innocent, and he only pronounced 3 divorces in '''ANGER'''. This proves that blaming only women for being emotionally unstable is not correct, but men could also become totally emotionally unstable, especially in the state of Anger and they are capable of doing every kind of stupid things, including killing others.
Some Islamic preachers and scholars argue that the reason for the 4 month and 10 days long 'iddah of a widow is to ''''mourn'''<nowiki/>' the death of the husband.<ref name=":0" /><ref>Reason for 4 months 10 days long Iddah of a widow [https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/88684/rights-of-a-deceased-husband-on-his-wife]</ref> Yet it should be noted that there is no obligation of any “mourning” upon a man if the wife dies. There is a clear  a double standard vis-a-vis the same situation involving a man and a woman, as the husband is totally free to marry a new wife the same night, without any waiting period in name of "mourning." He's also totally free to have sex with his other wives and dozens of slave girls the same night as his divorce, and there is no restriction upon him in name of "mourning."
*What type of '''Divine Wisdom''' is this, then to give right to such emotionally unstable men in anger to divorce their wives in 3 seconds, by saying 3 times Talaq Talaq Talaq?
*The consequences of such 3 times Talaq in anger has to be bear by the poor innocent wife, where her whole family is destroyed and she may loose her children too.
*And despite being totally innocent, again only she is forced to undergo the shameful process of Halala too, if she wishes to reunite with here family (i.e. husband and the children).
*Is it really that giving rights with Justice to the woman by Islam?


==Islam Critics: Blackmailing the women in name of ‘reconcilement & settlement’ in the Divorce Process==
Moreover, the 'iddah is even incumbent upon the widow in cases where she has never seen her husband after the marriage, and in cases where the marriage has not been consummated, and even if she is a minor child,  or even if the marriage was abusive <ref>Widow has to observe 'Iddah even if she never saw the husband after the marriage, or even if she is a small child. [https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/145179/the-waiting-period-of-an-old-woman-after-the-death-of-her-husband]</ref>. ''In all such cases, a widow has no emotional connection with the deceased husband, but still she has to undergo the restrictions of 'Iddah in name of mourning''. As such, feminist critics of the institution of the 'iddah have decried it as misogynist.
Islam critics claim while only the woman suffers during the long process of Islamic Talaq, thus it works as a weapon in hands of  an abusive husband, to blackmail her unjustly, and to usurp her rights by compelling her to give up her rights.  
{{Quote|1=[https://quranx.com/4.128?context=3 Quran 4:128-129]|2=And if a woman fears from her husband contempt or evasion, there is no sin upon them if they make terms of '''settlement''' between them (i.e. woman agrees upon leaving some of her rights) … And you will never be able to do '''Justice (Arabic: تَعْدِلُوْا)''' between wives, even if you should strive [to do so].}}


Islam critics point out that here occurs a contradiction in Islamic Sharia, while earlier at time of allowing 4 wives, the writer of Quran stipulated the condition of "Justice (Adl عدل)":
===Criticism of the 'Iddah of a pregnant woman===
According to the Quran, the 'iddah of a pregnant woman is till the birth of a child ([https://quranx.com/65.4 Quran 65:4]).


{{Quote|{{Quran|4|3}}|If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal '''JUSTLY (Arabic: تَعْدِلُوا۟)''' with them, then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice.}}
Muhammad in the hadith of Sunan Abu Dawud justifies the practice in this manner:
{{Quote|{{Abudawud||2158|darussalam}}|رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم يَقُولُ يَوْمَ حُنَيْنٍ قَالَ ‏"‏ لاَ يَحِلُّ لاِمْرِئٍ يُؤْمِنُ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الآخِرِ أَنْ يَسْقِيَ مَاءَهُ زَرْعَ غَيْرِهِ ‏"


But later the writer of Quran allowed the husband to blackmail the wife by threatening her with divorce, and showing contempt and evasion and thus compelling her to give away her rights in the name of settlement. Thus, the condition of Justice was abrogated for the so-called settlement which is always going in favor of the husband while he controls the right of giving divorce.


Muhammad himself threatened his wife Sawdah with Talaq (while she was older in age as compared to the other wives of Muhammad). Thus, Sawadah started weeping and she came to ‘Aisha’s house and told Muhammad that she was ready to give her TURN To ‘Aisaha, but Muhammad should not make her homeless by divorcing her in that old age. Sawdah served Muhammad the longest, and in the most difficult times, and she did nothing wrong. Still she had to suffer, and to give up her right in name of so-called 'settlement'.  
The Messenger of Allah said: It is not lawful for a man who believes in Allah and the last day '''to water what another has sown with his water (meaning intercourse with a woman who is pregnant from her previous husband).'''}}
This prohibition seems to imply some impurification of the preborn child by the seed of the second man, but scientifically once the woman has been impregnated this is impossible, the DNA of the baby will not be affected by any other semen in the woman's body. This hadith thus seems to present an unscientific view of human gestation. Moreover, the man is under all circumstances able to take sexual pleasure from any other wife or sex slave that he possess immediately after the end of his marital bond, but it is only the woman who is not allowed to fulfil her natural need to have love and sex from any man.


==Islam Advocates: Some women have Implantation Bleeding despite being pregnant==
====Criticism of the Islamic Ruling that a pregnant woman has to stay in the house of her ex-husband till the delivery====
Islam advocates that Islamic 'Iddah of 3 menstrual cycles is correct, while some women have implantation bleeding despite being pregnant, and it is difficult for a woman to differentiate between he periods and the [https://www.healthline.com/health/how-long-does-spotting-last#implantation-spotting implantation bleeding].   
A pregnant woman has to stay in the house of her ex-husband:
{{Quote|[https://web.archive.org/web/20210512143740/https://daruliftaa.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/rules_of_iddat-1.pdf Rules of Iddat]|If a woman is pregnant and her husband divorces her, she will have to remain in that house until she delivers her child.}}
This ruling is criticized while a woman is alone in the house of her ex-husband, and she has to observe Hijab from him too<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20210512143740/https://daruliftaa.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/rules_of_iddat-1.pdf Staying in the house of ex-husband, but also doing Purdah (Hijab) from him.] </ref>. Living under one roof with the ex-husband is a cause of mental torture for a woman.   


While Islam critics say that:
As compared to the house of ex-husband, she could find a lot of love in house of her parents or relatives and live freely there and deliver the child in the comfort of her family. 


*Laws and rules are made on the bases of "Generality", and not on the bases of "Exceptions".
===Criticism of 'Iddah in case of triple-talaq divorce===
*Islam itself does not accepts this "exceptional" incidents for making the "general laws".
If the husband says to his wife three times that he has divorced her, then she's formally considered to be divorced from him even if he said the three announcements in one sitting. The husband cannot remarry his wife unless she marries another man and gets divorced by him. This means that the moment the husband pronounces three Talaqs (announcements of divorce) in one sitting, his wife will need to go through a waiting period of three menstrual cycles where she's forced to stay at her ex-husband's home. But this ruling is criticized as unnecesary, since the parentage of the child could be determined after just the first menstrual cycle (as in case of the captive/slave woman). Therefore, logically the 'Iddah should be only one menstrual cycle long if the idea of assuring the parentage of any babies were to be followed to its logical conclusion<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20220113121219/https://atheism-vs-islam.com/index.php/women/94-iddah-i-e-waiting-period-is-illogical-unnecessary-oppressive-injustice-against-the-women Iddah of 3 menstrual cycles in case of 3 Talaqs in one sitting]</ref>. Scholars claim that one of the purposes of the Iddah is to give a chance for reconciliation between the couple. This may be true in the case of a single or double talaq divorce, but after 3 Talaqs there's no chance of reconciliation which makes the additional two menstrual cycles not only meaningless but also mentally harmful for the divorced wife as she's forced to live with her ex-husband in the same home for three menstrual cycles.{{Quote|[https://web.archive.org/web/20210512143740/https://daruliftaa.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/rules_of_iddat-1.pdf Rules of Iddat]|When the husband divorces his wife, she will have to spend her Iddat in the matrimonial home. She must not leave the house during the day nor at night, nor can she make nikah with anyone else ... This rule will apply irrespective of whether the man issued one two or three divorces, and irrespective of whether he issued a talaaqul baa-in (irrevocable divorce) or a talaaq-ur-raj’ee (revocable Talaaq). The same rule will apply in all cases ... If she is observing her ‘Iddat in the same house wherein the man who issued a talaaqul baain to her is also living, she will have to observe strict Purdah (Hijab) with him.}}Moreover, in the present modern era, it is not necessary to wait even for one menstrual cycle, as the pregnancy and paternity can be determined right away through the modern medical tests.
*Therefore, Islam itself made a law that the 'Iddah of a prisoner/slave woman is only one menstrual cycle.


Islam advocates reply it by saying that the ''''status'''<nowiki/>' of a slave woman is not equal to the the status of a free woman, and thus Islam is correct to extend the 'Iddah of free woman to 3 months in case of divorce.
===Implantation Bleeding Despite Being pregnant===


But Islam critics point out that:
Islamic preachers and scholars claim that the Islamic 'Iddah of 3 menstrual cycles is correct, since some women have implantation bleeding (bleeding from when the fertilized egg attaches to the lining of the uterus.) despite being pregnant, and it is difficult for a woman to differentiate between the periods and the [https://www.healthline.com/health/how-long-does-spotting-last#implantation-spotting implantation bleeding]. Yet despite this rule, traditional Islamic law itself stipulates an 'Iddah of a prisoner/slave woman as only one menstrual cycle, in contradiction to this idea. If parentage were the main issue, the status of the woman (free or slave) should not matter. Also some jurists including Ibn Taymiyah say that the 'Iddah of a free Muslim woman in the case of [[Khul']] is only one period.<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/5163/does-iddah-apply-in-the-case-of-khula 'Iddah in Khul' is one menstrual period]</ref> Even Muhammad himself slept with [[Safiyah]] the same night when her first menstrual blood stopped, after he had murdered her previous husband. Note that Safiyyah was not a slave, but a free woman when Muhammad took her as a wife: {{Quote|{{Muslim|8|3325}}|He (the Holy Prophet) then granted Saffiyyah emancipation and married her. Thabit said to him: Abu Hamza, how much dower did he (the Holy Prophet) give to her? He said: He granted her freedom and then married her. On the way Umm Sulaim embellished her and then sent her to him (the Holy Prophet) at night.}}{{Quote|{{Bukhari|||2893|darussalam}}|Narrated Anas bin Malik: We arrived at Khaibar, and when Allah helped His Apostle to open the fort, the beauty of Safiya bint Huyai bin Akhtaq whose husband had been killed while she was a bride, was mentioned to Allah's Apostle. The Prophet selected her for himself, and set out with her, and when we reached a place called Sidd-as-Sahba,' '''Safiya became clean from her (first) menses then Allah's Apostle took her into his bed.'''}}


*This issue is not about the '<nowiki/>'''status'''<nowiki/>' of a slave woman or a free woman, but the issue is about the ''''parentage'''<nowiki/>' of the child, which stays the same in both the cases.
There is no Sahih Hadith of the prophet in which he ever mentions the 'Iddah of 3 periods due to any implantation bleeding. Muhammad adopted the practice of 'Iddah from his native Arabian culture. It is in response to modern conceptions of biology and ideals about women's rights that these arguments about parentage have been formulated. But these arguments fall flat, as upon further inspection the contradictions in them are evident (such as having sex with a slave girl after one menstrual cycle). They are not based on the actual source material but rather on a desire to make the source material acceptable to a modern audience.  
*And even the 'Iddah of free Muslim woman in Islam in case of Khul' is only one period<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/5163/does-iddah-apply-in-the-case-of-khula 'Iddah in Khul' is one menstrual period]</ref>.
*And Muhammad himself slept with Saffiyyah the same night when her first menstrual blood stopped. Note that Saffiyyah was not a slave, but a free woman when Muhammad took her as a wife.
{{Quote|{{Muslim|16|99}}|He (the Holy Prophet) then granted Saffiyyah emancipation and married her. Thabit said to him: Abu Hamza, how much dower did he (the Holy Prophet) give to her? He said: He granted her freedom and then married her. On the way Umm Sulaim embellished her and then sent her to him (the Holy Prophet) at night.}}{{Quote|{{Bukhari|||2893|darussalam}}|Narrated Anas bin Malik: We arrived at Khaibar, and when Allah helped His Apostle to open the fort, the beauty of Safiya bint Huyai bin Akhtaq whose husband had been killed while she was a bride, was mentioned to Allah's Apostle. The Prophet selected her for himself, and set out with her, and when we reached a place called Sidd-as-Sahba,' '''Safiya became clean from her (first) menses then Allah's Apostle took her into his bed.'''}}


Thus Islam critics claim that:
===No waiting period in name of "mourning" for the captive/slave women===
 
In spite of the aforementioned claims of concern for the well-being of women, according to traditional [[Fiqh (Islamic Jurisprudence)]] Muslim men are allowed to derive sexual pleasures from the virgin girls taken as war booty during Jihad  without giving them any 'waiting period' to mourn their dead family members. As far as the non-virgin slaves taken as war booty are concerned, if they already have husbands, then vaginal coitus is not allowed till they become free of their first menstrual period, but the Muslim Mujhaahiduun (i.e. warriors) are allowed to undress them the same night and to take all kinds of other sexual pleasures and sexual favors from them aside from vaginal penetration.
*There is no Hadith of Muhammad present, in which he ever mentioned 'Iddah of 3 periods due to any Implantation bleeding.
{{Quote|1=Fath ِAl-Bari by Ibn Hajar, Dar Al-Ma'rifah, vol.4 p.423|2=وقال عطاء لا بأس أن يصيب من جاريته الحامل ما دون الفرج
*Muhammad adopted the practice of 'Iddah, while it was the tradition of that era, and Muhammad was a part of that society.
*But in the modern era, when science discovered these facts, then Muslims now try to present these scientific discoveries as miracles of Islam.
*But Muslims will fail, as contradictions in Islam will then occur (like Muslims having sex with prisoner/slave women and  while Muhammad had himself sex with Saffiyyah after only the first menstrual cycle.
*And what about a minor girl wife (who does not menstruate yet), or an old lady (who could not bear any children), or a woman who hasn't seen her husband for years? Muhammad ordered them too to observe the 'Iddah of 3 periods (or 3 months) too. But why? Certainly not due to the implantation bleeding in them, but while it was a tradition of that era.
 
==Islam Critics:Why no 'Iddah in name of 'mourning' for the Prisoner/Slave women?==
Islam critics point out that:
 
*Muslim are allowed to drive sexual pleasures from the prisoner virgin girls with ‘penetration’ the same night, without giving them any time to mourn their dead family members.
*And as far as the prisoner women are concerned, who already have husbands, then penetration in their vaginas is not allowed. But still Muslims are allowed to undress them and to take all kind of sexual pleasures with their naked bodies except for penetration.
{{Quote|1=[http://web.archive.org/save/http://library.islamweb.net/newlibrary/display_book.php?idfrom=4080&idto=4081&bk_no=52&ID=1404&idfrom=4523&idto=5022&bookid=18&startno=425 Imam Ibn Hajar al-Asqallani, in his book Fath-ul-Bari]|2=وقال عطاء لا بأس أن يصيب من جاريته الحامل ما دون الفرج


Translation:
Translation:
Line 301: Line 218:


Hasan Basri finds nothing objectionable in kissing a woman or to having sex with her. And Ibn Umar said that such a slave woman who is given as a present, or who is sold, or who is made free, but sex had been done with her before that, then she had to undergo a waiting period. '''And Atta said if a slave woman had become pregnant (from the earlier owner/husband), then still pleasure could be derived from the whole of her body, except for her vagina.'''}}
Hasan Basri finds nothing objectionable in kissing a woman or to having sex with her. And Ibn Umar said that such a slave woman who is given as a present, or who is sold, or who is made free, but sex had been done with her before that, then she had to undergo a waiting period. '''And Atta said if a slave woman had become pregnant (from the earlier owner/husband), then still pleasure could be derived from the whole of her body, except for her vagina.'''}}
In order to understand the trauma of those captive women due to the killing of their relatives, please see the following tradition.
The sorrow and pain of such women are recorded in Tabari:
{{Quote|1=[https://books.google.de/books?id=4A-4ZC4l0dMC&pg=PA122&lpg=PA122&dq=she+commanded+that+Safiyyah+should+be+kept+behind+him+and+that+the+Messenger+of+God+had+chosen+her+for+himself&source=bl&ots=pHDBKo-6Bv&sig=W8sWDq8ZJ4nLwFZpsA1obfYZJ48&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwizjuC41L7bAhVHXRQKHSEhD7EQ6AEIKTAA#v=onepage&q=she%20commanded%20that%20Safiyyah%20should%20be%20kept%20behind%20him%20and%20that%20the%20Messenger%20of%20God%20had%20chosen%20her%20for%20himself&f=false History of Tabari, Volume 8, Page 112]|2=Ibn Ishaq said: After the Messenger of God conquered al-Qamus, Safiyyah bint Huyayy was brought to him, and another woman with her. Bilal (a companion), who was the one who brought them, led them past some of the slain Jews. When the woman who was with Safiyyah saw them, she cried out, struck her face, and poured dust on her head. When the Messenger of God saw her, he said, "Take this she-devil away from me!" ... The Messenger of God said to Bilal, when he saw the Jewish woman doing what he saw her do, "Are you devoid of mercy, Bilal, that you take two women past their slain men?"}}
{{Quote|1=[https://books.google.de/books?id=4A-4ZC4l0dMC&pg=PA122&lpg=PA122&dq=she+commanded+that+Safiyyah+should+be+kept+behind+him+and+that+the+Messenger+of+God+had+chosen+her+for+himself&source=bl&ots=pHDBKo-6Bv&sig=W8sWDq8ZJ4nLwFZpsA1obfYZJ48&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwizjuC41L7bAhVHXRQKHSEhD7EQ6AEIKTAA#v=onepage&q=she%20commanded%20that%20Safiyyah%20should%20be%20kept%20behind%20him%20and%20that%20the%20Messenger%20of%20God%20had%20chosen%20her%20for%20himself&f=false History of Tabari, Volume 8, Page 112]|2=Ibn Ishaq said: After the Messenger of God conquered al-Qamus, Safiyyah bint Huyayy was brought to him, and another woman with her. Bilal (a companion), who was the one who brought them, led them past some of the slain Jews. When the woman who was with Safiyyah saw them, she cried out, struck her face, and poured dust on her head. When the Messenger of God saw her, he said, "Take this she-devil away from me!" ... The Messenger of God said to Bilal, when he saw the Jewish woman doing what he saw her do, "Are you devoid of mercy, Bilal, that you take two women past their slain men?"}}  
Islam critics thus question the double standards here:  
 
The clear disregard for the well-being of women presents a conundrum for modern day advocates of these Islamic laws and traditions. On one hand, Islamic law advocates claim that a Muslim woman is not allowed to be wed during 3 periods/months long 'Iddah while she is mentally under stress after the divorce. Yet on the flip side of the coin, by endorsing a tradition with such endorsements of sexual slavery, they ignore any such mental stress for the prisoner women and girls. Far away from the subject of divorce, even after killing all the men of their family, Muslim men are allowed their use sex objects the very same night that their slavery begins. They are provided with no 'waiting period' to come out of their mental stress.
 
Contrary to Islam, even the laws of the Jewish Bible allowed the prisoner women to mourn their relatives for one complete month, during which men were not allowed  to take any other sexual services from them. 
 
{{Quote|1=[https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Deuteronomy%2021&version=NIV Bible, Deuteronomy, Chap 21]|2=יכִּֽי־תֵצֵ֥א לַמִּלְחָמָ֖ה עַל־אֹֽיְבֶ֑יךָ וּנְתָנ֞וֹ יְהֹוָ֧ה אֱלֹהֶ֛יךָ בְּיָדֶ֖ךָ וְשָׁבִ֥יתָ שִׁבְיֽוֹ:
 
יאוְרָאִ֨יתָ֙ בַּשִּׁבְיָ֔ה אֵ֖שֶׁת יְפַת־תֹּ֑אַר וְחָֽשַׁקְתָּ֣ בָ֔הּ וְלָֽקַחְתָּ֥ לְךָ֖ לְאִשָּֽׁה:
 
יבוַֽהֲבֵאתָ֖הּ אֶל־תּ֣וֹךְ בֵּיתֶ֑ךָ וְגִלְּחָה֙ אֶת־רֹאשָׁ֔הּ וְעָֽשְׂתָ֖ה אֶת־צִפָּֽרְנֶֽיהָ:


*On one side, Islam advocates claim that Muslim women is not allowed to be wed during 3 periods/months long 'Iddah while she is mentally under stress after the divorce.
יגוְהֵסִ֩ירָה֩ אֶת־שִׂמְלַ֨ת שִׁבְיָ֜הּ מֵֽעָלֶ֗יהָ וְיָֽשְׁבָה֙ בְּבֵיתֶ֔ךָ וּבָֽכְתָ֛ה אֶת־אָבִ֥יהָ וְאֶת־אִמָּ֖הּ יֶ֣רַח יָמִ֑ים וְאַ֨חַר כֵּ֜ן תָּב֤וֹא אֵלֶ֨יהָ֙ וּבְעַלְתָּ֔הּ וְהָֽיְתָ֥ה לְךָ֖ לְאִשָּֽׁה:
*But on the other side, they deny any such mental stress for the prisoner women and girls, and what to talk about divorce, but even after killing all the men of their family, Muslim men use them as sex object the same night. They are provided with no time to come out of their mental stress.


Contrary to Islam, the Judaims and the Christianity allowed the prisoner women to mourn their relatives for one complete month, during which men were not allowed  to take any other sexual services from them. 
ידוְהָיָ֞ה אִם־לֹ֧א חָפַ֣צְתָּ בָּ֗הּ וְשִׁלַּחְתָּהּ֙ לְנַפְשָׁ֔הּ וּמָכֹ֥ר לֹֽא־תִמְכְּרֶ֖נָּה בַּכָּ֑סֶף לֹֽא־תִתְעַמֵּ֣ר בָּ֔הּ תַּ֖חַת אֲשֶׁ֥ר עִנִּיתָֽהּ:


{{Quote|1=[https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Deuteronomy%2021&version=NIV Bible, Deuteronomy, Chap 21]|2='''Marrying a Captive Woman'''
'''Marrying a Captive Woman'''


(10) When you go to war against your enemies and the Lord your God delivers them into your hands and you take captives,
(10) When you go to war against your enemies and the Lord your God delivers them into your hands and you take captives,
Line 322: Line 247:
(14) If you are not pleased with her, let her go wherever she wishes. You must not sell her or treat her as a slave, since you have dishonored her.}}
(14) If you are not pleased with her, let her go wherever she wishes. You must not sell her or treat her as a slave, since you have dishonored her.}}


Islam critics point out that Muhammad rejected the Sharia of Moses in this case, and he followed the laws of the pagan Arab society of that time, as it benefitted him and the Muslims financially and they were free to seek sexual pleasures through the prisoner women the same night.  
In creating these new rulings around taking the sexual pleasure of female sex slaves, Islamic law rejected the law of the Bible in this case, and more closely followed the laws of the pagan Arab society of the time of Muhammad, as it benefitted the Muslims financially and they were free to seek sexual pleasures through the prisoner women the same night.


==References==
==References==
{{reflist}}
{{reflist}}
[[ar:عدّة]]

Latest revision as of 01:18, 29 January 2023

In Islamic Sharia, 'iddah or 'iddat (Arabic: العدة‎; period (of waiting)), also spelled iddah, idda, or iddat, is the period a woman must observe after the death of her husband or after a divorce, during which she has to face numbers of restrictions[1].

The 'iddah (waiting period) of different kind of women in Islam varies depending on her status:

  • A widowed woman: The waiting period is 4 months and 10 days
  • A pregnant woman: The waiting period is up to 9 months (till the birth of the baby)
  • A divorced woman: The waiting period is 3 menstrual cycles.

Muslim scholars defend these restrictions upon the women in 'Iddah. They claim that rulings of 'Iddah could neither be abolished, nor could they be changed as the rulings of the Islamic Sharia are based upon wisdom, justice and the best interests of the women, and they protect the women against the gender oppression and misogyny, while the man made laws of the modern Western world lead to the sexual exploitation of the women[2][3]. Yet in point of fact women are forced to unilaterally face these restrictions, which make their life difficult, while the husbands don't have to face any restriction. The basis of these restrictions, the need to be sure of fatherhood, has been rendered obsolete by modern science. In addition, these restrictions are not found anywhere in the bible or Judeo-Christian tradition. Their antecedents seem rather to be pre-Islamic Arab culture (which is known as "Time of Ignorance (i.e. jāhiliyyah)"[4].

The different lengths of the waiting periods and their reasons

The length of 'iddah (waiting period) of different kind of women in Islam varies depending on her status:

  • A prisoner/slave woman: The waiting period is becoming free from the blood of the first menstrual cycle[5]. The reason is to determine the parentage of the child. Islam considers first menstrual cycle as enough to determine if a woman is pregnant or not.
  • A divorced woman: The waiting period is 3 menstrual cycles. The reason is to make sure she's not pregnant before she can marry another man and to give time to the couple to solve their dispute during this period[5][6].
  • A widowed woman: The waiting period is 4 months and 10 days. The reason is to make sure she's not pregnant before she can marry another man and to give time to the woman to mourn the death of her husband[5][6].
  • A pregnant woman: The waiting period is up to 9 months (till the birth of the baby). The reason is to prevent that another man (as 2nd husband) could "water" the unborn child from the previous husband[5][7].

Islamic Divorce and The 'Idaah

An important factor in Islamic divorce is whether the husband has declared the divorce for three times or less.

The case of a single or a double divorce:

If the husband says to his wife, once or twice, that he has divorces her, then she begins her 'Iddah period which lasts for three menstrual cycles. During this period, she’s still formally considered to be his wife: He’s obliged to house her and provide for her and they both can inherit from one another in case of death. During the Iddah, the husband can cancel the divorce even without her approval by saying that he's taken her back to him or by having sex with her. But if the 'Iddah period passes without any of these two events, then she’s formally divorced.[8] After that, if the husband wishes to remarry her, he needs a new marriage contract, two witnesses, to pay the Mahr (Marital Price) and he also needs her approval.[9]


The case of a triple divorce:

If the husband declares the divorce for three times, by saying “I have divorced you, I have divorced you, I have divorced you”, then the woman is no longer considered to be his wife.[10] She enters her 'Iddah period which lasts for three menstrual cycles. The husband cannot remarry her unless she marries another man and gets divorced again.[11] This is based on the following Hadith from Sahih Bukhari:

The wife of Rifa`a Al-Qurazi came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger! Rifa`a divorced me irrevocably. After him I married `Abdur-Rahman bin Az-Zubair Al-Qurazi who proved to be impotent." Allah's Messenger said to her, "Perhaps you want to return to Rifa`a? Nay (you cannot return to Rifa`a) until you and `Abdur-Rahman consummate your marriage."


In summary, if the husband declares divorce once or twice and doesn't cancel the divorce during her waiting period, his wife is formally divorced and he needs a new marriage contract to remarry her. But if the husband declares divorce thrice then his wife is immediately considered to be formally divorced regardless of her waiting period, and the husband cannot remarry his triple-talaq divorced wife unless she marries another man and gets divorced by him.

Triple-talaq divorce in one sitting proved to be problematic:

1- In one moment of anger, a husband could end the marriage and the family by saying a triple divorce, and the literature is clear that his remorse or regret does not invalidate the triple-talaq.

2- Triple divorce led to the spread of a fake kind of marriage where a divorced woman is married to another man only for him to immediately divorce her so that she can return to her original husband. This practice is called Nikah Al-Tahlil نكاح التحليل. [12]

This triple divorce in one sitting is considered valid by most classical scholars and by the four traditional Sunni schools of Islamic jurisprudence.[13]

Ibn Taymiyah (d.1328) was the one who popularized the minority opinion which says that a triple repition of the word divorce (talaaq طلاق) in one sitting counts only as one divorce. And for that opinion, Ibn Taymiyah was accused of breaking the consensus and he was sent to prison.[14] Despite the opposition to this at the time, Ibn Taymiya’s opinion is the popular one in the Muslim world today.[15][16]

Another opinion of Ibn Taymiyah which was adopted by prominent Saudi scholars Ibn Baz and Ibn Uthaymin is that in a single menstrual cycle only one divorce counts[17]. This would imply that for the husband to initiate a triple-talaq divorce he needs to declare divorce once in the each of the three menstrual cycles of the 'Iddah period.

The rights and the restrictions during the 'Iddah

1- The case of a single or a double-talaq divorce (by saying “I divorce you” once or twice, in one sitting or two different sittings)

This case is the best for the divorced wife in terms of her rights since she’s considered to be married to her husband until the waiting period is over. During the waiting period, scholars unanimously agree that the husband is obliged to house his wife and provide for her.[18] If the waiting period ends without the husband canceling the divorce, then she’s no longer considered to be his wife.

The wife cannot leave the husband’s house during the waiting period. The four mainstream schools of Sunni Islamic jurisprudence have the following opinions on the right of leaving the house during the waiting period of a woman divorced with less than three divorce announcements:

The Hanafi and the Shafi’i schools: She cannot leave her husband’s house neither during the day nor the night.

The Hanbali and the Maliki schools: She can leave the house during the day for her daily needs. But she cannot leave during the night because it’s the time when adultery is feared.[19]


2- The case of a triple-talaq divorce (The husband says “I divorce you” three times in one sitting or multiple sittings).

The four schools of Islamic jurisprudence have different views:

The Hanafi school: The husband is obliged to house his triple-talaq divorced wife and provide for her.

The Hanbali school: The husband isn’t obliged to house her nor provide for her in the case of triple-talaq.

The Shafi’i and the Maliki schools: The husband is obliged to house her but not obliged to provide for her except in case she’s pregnant; the husband here is obliged to provide for her until she gives birth.[20]

As for the right of leaving the house during the waiting period of a triply divorced woman, the Maliki, Shafi’i and Hanbali schools say that she can leave the house during the day for her daily needs, but she can’t leave during the night, while the Hanafi school says she cannot leave not in the day nor in the night.[21]

Fatwa from Islam q&a:

If the husband has divorced her with a first or second talaaq (divorce announcement), it is not permissible for her to go out of her house during her ‘iddah, and it is not permissible for him to throw her out until her ‘iddah is over, whereupon she becomes a non-mahram for him. The reason for that is that perhaps he may decide to take her back, which is what Islam encourages. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And turn them not out of their (husband’s) homes nor shall they (themselves) leave, except in case they are guilty of some open illegal sexual intercourse. And those are the set limits of Allaah. And whosoever transgresses the set limits of Allaah, then indeed he has wronged himself. You (the one who divorces his wife) know not it may be that Allaah will afterward bring some new thing to pass (i.e. to return her back to you if that was the first or second divorce)”

[al-Talaaq 65:1]

During her ‘iddah, it is permissible for her to uncover in front of her husband and adorn herself for him, and for him to speak to her and be alone with her, but he does not have the right to have intercourse with her until after he has taken her back, or he has intercourse with her with the intention of taking her back.

If the husband has divorced his wife with the last of three talaaqs, or he has divorced her twice or once and her ‘iddah has ended, then she becomes a non-mahram for him and it is not permissible for him to be alone with her, to touch her or to look at her.


A widowed wife goes through additional mourning restrictions in her waiting period. The mourning restrictions are the avoidance of wearing perfume, beautiful clothes, and jewelry during the waiting period.[22] Many scholars say a formally divorced woman should go through the same mourning restrictions to mourn the loss of the blessing of marriage. The views of the four Sunni schools of jurisprudence on this issue are as follows: The Hanafi school says a formally divorced woman has to mourn. The Maliki school says she doesn’t need to mourn, while each of the Shafi’i and the Hanbali schools are split on this issue.[23]


3- The case of a widowed woman.

During the waiting period which lasts for four months and ten days, the widow is obliged to stay in her home. She can leave during the day for her daily needs, but she can’t leave during the night.[24]

There’s disagreement between scholars on whether the widowed woman has the right to housing and maintenance out of her dead husband’s money and estate. The Hanafi and the Hanbali schools say she doesn’t have the right. The Maliki school says she has the right. While the Shafi’i school is split on this issue, with the prominent opinion saying she has the right. Those who say a widowed woman doesn’t have the right for housing and maintenance have based their opinion on:

1- A hadith where Muhammad says: “A (divorced) woman is entitled for housing and provision only if her husband can take her back (i.e. she isn’t triple-talaq divorced, or still in her 'Iddah in case of a single or a double divorce)."

2- The dead husband’s house and money belong to the heirs. The widowed wife is only entitled to her share of the inheritance.[25]


The mourning restrictions:

Scholars unanimously agree that a widowed wife should mourn her husband during the waiting period. She mourns him by avoiding wearing perfume, beautiful clothes, and jewelry during her waiting period (4 months and 10 days).[26]

Fatwa from Islam Q&A:

It is forbidden for a woman at the time of mourning to do the following:

1 – To go out of her house, except for a necessary purpose, such as if she is sick and needs to go to the hospital, in which case she should go during the day; or in the case of emergencies such as if her house is about to fall down and there is the fear that it may collapse on top of her; or in the case of fire; and so on.

The scholars said: she may go out during the day for necessary purposes, but at night she should not go out unless it is essential.

2 – To wear perfume, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade the grieving woman to put on perfume except when she purifies herself following her period, in which case she may applies a little azfaar (a kind of perfume) after her period ends, to take away the traces of menstruation.

3 – To wear beautiful clothes that are considered to be adornments, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade that. Rather she should wear ordinary clothes such as the kind that she usually wears inside her house, without making herself look beautiful.

4 – She should not put on kohl, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade that. If she needs to use it, she should use the kind of kohl whose colour is not obvious, putting it on at night and removing it during the day.

5 – She should not wear any jewellery, because if she is forbidden to wear beautiful clothes, it is more appropriate that jewellery should not be allowed.

It is permissible for her to speak to men and to speak on the telephone, and to allow people to enter the house who are permitted to do so according to sharee’ah, and to go out onto the roof of the house during the night and during the day.

Restrictions upon the woman during her 'Iddah

Islamic 'Iddah not only prohibits the women from remarriage with another man, but it also puts other restrictions upon them. In the case of a widowed woman, she may face more restrictions than a formally divorced woman; yet jurists are split on whether a formally divorced woman should go through the same restrictions of a widowed woman.

First Restriction: She has to undergo the 'Iddah even without any 'maintenance' money

Jurists are split on this issue with many saying that a widowed woman is not entitled to any support from the deceased husband's family or estate. Dar-ul-Ifta takes the following opinion:

The maintenance and providing of shelter for a woman observing the Iddat of Death are not the responsibility of her in-laws. She also does not have the right to take her maintenance out of the Estate of her deceased husband.

A woman has no choice but to compulsorily undergo the 'Iddah of period of 4 months and 10 days (or up to 9 months in case of pregnancy), yet she has no right for maintenance money from the estate of her husband for this long period of time, and this in traditional cultures where women often rely upon men for their sustenance. In such cultures this stricture would be a huge financial burden upon the women, who often did not and do not even have any source of income.

Second Restriction: She has to stay in the house of her ex-Husband during the entirety of the ‘Iddah

If a woman's husband dies then she is allowed to stay only in the house of her husband during this whole period of 'Iddah. She is not allowed to spend this time of 'Iddah in any other place (like house of her parents or any other family members).[27][28] A Hadith recorded in Sunan Abu Dawud bears witness to this custom, and further clarifies that her need for financial support is not to be taken into consideration. It should be noted though that jurists are split on whether a triply divorced woman or a widowed woman has the right for financial support and housing. The following Hadith, classified as authentic by Al-Albani, shows that a widowed woman has to stay in the husband’s house, even if it doesn’t belong to her husband, or even if he hasn’t left any maintenance money for the wife

Furay'ah said that she came to the Messenger of Allah and asked him whether she could return to her people, Banu Khidrah, for her husband went out seeking his slaves who ran away. When they met him at al-Qudum, they murdered him.

So I asked the Messenger of Allah: "Should I return to my people, for he did not leave any dwelling house of his own and maintenance for me?

She said: The Messenger of Allah replied: Yes. She said: I came out, and when I was in the apartment or in the mosque, he called for me, or he commanded (someone to call me) and, therefore, I was called.

He said: what did you say? So I repeated my story which I had already mentioned about my husband.

Thereupon he said: Stay in your house till the term (of four months and 10 days) lapses.

She said: So I passed my waiting period in it (her house) for four months and ten days. When Uthman ibn Affan became caliph, he sent for me and asked me about that; so I informed him, and he followed it and decided cases accordingly.

Although this clearly serves the purpose of insuring that the next man who marries her does not inherit a son from the previous marriage or another man she had relations with during her 'Iddah, the wellbeing of the woman here is not considered at all; her need to either work to support herself or be with her own family for succor and support is not taken into account at all, and neither is her freedom of movement and intention.

Third Restriction: The Woman should not leave the house even for daily walks, or visit the relatives or attend any social gathering

Question: Is a woman allowed to visit family members like her parents or sisters if she is observing iddat and use the excuse that she will be with her family so she doesn’t see the problem?
Answer: A woman who has been divorced is not allowed to leave the confines of her home during the iddat for whatever reason, be it to visit friends or relatives or to attend the funeral of even her parents.

Jurists agree that a woman observing her Iddah must not leave her house, with many jurists saying she can only leave for necessary needs. Many Islamic fatawa (religious rulings) decree that Muslim women observing their 'iddah must not leave their (husband's) house even for a walk and certainly not for any type of social gathering (Fatwa 1, Fatwa 2). Although this makes sense from the perspective of insuring that her next husband does not inherit the baby of a man she had relations with during her 'iddah and that any pregnancy which comes about in the 'iddah can only be the work of her husband, it completely disregards her human rights. No consideration is given for the women's freedom of movement, freedom of choice, social or relationship needs.

Fourth Restriction: The mourning woman should not even use collyrium/kohl on her eyes even for eye disease, since it beautifies her

Although a woman is allowed to take medical care during her ‘iddah, still she should not use collyrium/kohl as a cure even against any eye disease, since this substance can be used as a form of makeup to beautifie her. According to many jurists, this restriction not only applies on a widowed woman, but it also applies to a formally divorced woman.

Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said, "No."

Fifth Restriction: Women are not allowed to use good clothes, jewelry, perfume, Henna and to comb their hair or to oil it

Widowed women observing their 'Iddah are not allowed to wear good clothes, or jewelry, or use perfume or Henna. With some jurists saying that even combing their hair and applying the oil to it is forbidden[29].

Umm Salama said: God’s Messenger came to visit me when Abu Salama died, and I had put the juice of aloes on myself. He asked me what it was, and I told him it was only the juice of aloes and contained no perfume, so he said, “It gives the face a glow, so apply it only at night and remove it in the daytime, and do not comb yourself with scent or henna, for it is a dye.” I asked God’s Messenger what I should use when combing myself, and he told me to use lote-tree leaves and smear my head copiously with them. Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani declared this Hadith to be FAIR (حسن) (link).

Although these strictures again work to keep the woman from having any intercourse or attracting any male attention during her 'iddah by keeping herself (relatively) unattractive, these laws once again completely disregard the happiness and freedom of the woman to whom they are applied. They also seem excessively harsh, as if she is truly keeping herself confined to her house the question arises as to who would see her with all of this makeup on even if she did apply it.

Pre-Islamic Influences on the Concept of ‘Iddah

According to the following hadith, the concept of 'iddah was taken from pre-Islamic Arabian culture:

Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said, "No." Then Allah's Messenger added, "It is just a matter of four months and ten days. In the Pre-Islamic Period of ignorance a widow among you should throw a globe of dung when one year has elapsed (i.e. she had to stay in ‘Iddah for the whole one year)."

Apparently women even at the time the hadith was created were complaining of the burdens of the 'iddah, but the hadith admonishes them that they ought to be thankful for Islam, since in the jahiliyyah (the pre-islamic time of "ignorance" before the coming of Islam in the Arab peninsula) the 'iddah lasted a whole year. That there were complaints, though, can be seen from the existence of the hadith in the first place, so even in the time of this hadith women were not happy with them; by comparison, modern secular culture imposes no such restrictions on women at all.

Waiting period for the captive/slave-women

The waiting period of captive/slave-women is as follows:

  • If she is a virgin girl, then no waiting period is necessary, and the Muslim owner is allowed to force her to provide him the sexual services the same night.
  • If she's married and has a husband, then the waiting period is to become free of the first menstrual blood. Even if this blood stopped the first night after the capture/purchase, the owner is allowed to force her to provide him the sexual services the same night.
(Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said): ... it is not lawful for a man who believes in Allah and the Last Day to have intercourse with a captive woman till she is free from a menstrual course (i.e. her first menstrual blood).

Imam Abdullah Ibn Abi Zayd (who is also knows as younger Imam Malik), writes in his Fiqh book Risalah:

واستبراء الامة في انتقال الملك حيضة انتقل الملك ببيع أو هبة أو سبي أو غير ذلك. ومن هي في حيازته قدحاضت عنده ثم إنه اشتراها فلا استبراء عليها إن لم تكن تخرج.
The istibrā' (waiting) period for a slave concubine who changes ownership is one menstruation. Ownership may change by selling, giving away, capture, or any other way. If the woman menstruates after being taken possession of in advance by her new owner, and then he buys her, she does not have to go through a period of istibrā' (i.e. waiting period).

Even if the first menstrual blood stops the first night after becoming captive/purchase, the Muslim owner is allowed to have sex with her the same night.

Saffiyyah (a Jewish captive woman) became free of her blood the next night after her father, brother and husband were killed in the war by Muslims. Thus Muhammad had sex with her the next night

Narrated Anas bin Malik: We arrived at Khaibar, and when Allah helped His Apostle to open the fort, (then) the beauty of Safiya bint Huyai bin Akhtaq whose husband had been killed while she was a bride, was mentioned to Allah's Apostle. The Prophet (ﷺ) selected her for himself, and set out with her, and when we reached a place called Sidd-as-Sahba, (which is 14 miles away from Khaibar)' Safiya became clean from her menses then Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) married her.

Criticism of the Islamic 'Iddah

Criticism of the 'Iddah of a widow

Some Islamic preachers and scholars argue that the reason for the 4 month and 10 days long 'iddah of a widow is to 'mourn' the death of the husband.[6][30] Yet it should be noted that there is no obligation of any “mourning” upon a man if the wife dies. There is a clear a double standard vis-a-vis the same situation involving a man and a woman, as the husband is totally free to marry a new wife the same night, without any waiting period in name of "mourning." He's also totally free to have sex with his other wives and dozens of slave girls the same night as his divorce, and there is no restriction upon him in name of "mourning."

Moreover, the 'iddah is even incumbent upon the widow in cases where she has never seen her husband after the marriage, and in cases where the marriage has not been consummated, and even if she is a minor child, or even if the marriage was abusive [31]. In all such cases, a widow has no emotional connection with the deceased husband, but still she has to undergo the restrictions of 'Iddah in name of mourning. As such, feminist critics of the institution of the 'iddah have decried it as misogynist.

Criticism of the 'Iddah of a pregnant woman

According to the Quran, the 'iddah of a pregnant woman is till the birth of a child (Quran 65:4).

Muhammad in the hadith of Sunan Abu Dawud justifies the practice in this manner:

رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم يَقُولُ يَوْمَ حُنَيْنٍ قَالَ ‏"‏ لاَ يَحِلُّ لاِمْرِئٍ يُؤْمِنُ بِاللَّهِ وَالْيَوْمِ الآخِرِ أَنْ يَسْقِيَ مَاءَهُ زَرْعَ غَيْرِهِ ‏"


The Messenger of Allah said: It is not lawful for a man who believes in Allah and the last day to water what another has sown with his water (meaning intercourse with a woman who is pregnant from her previous husband).

This prohibition seems to imply some impurification of the preborn child by the seed of the second man, but scientifically once the woman has been impregnated this is impossible, the DNA of the baby will not be affected by any other semen in the woman's body. This hadith thus seems to present an unscientific view of human gestation. Moreover, the man is under all circumstances able to take sexual pleasure from any other wife or sex slave that he possess immediately after the end of his marital bond, but it is only the woman who is not allowed to fulfil her natural need to have love and sex from any man.

Criticism of the Islamic Ruling that a pregnant woman has to stay in the house of her ex-husband till the delivery

A pregnant woman has to stay in the house of her ex-husband:

If a woman is pregnant and her husband divorces her, she will have to remain in that house until she delivers her child.

This ruling is criticized while a woman is alone in the house of her ex-husband, and she has to observe Hijab from him too[32]. Living under one roof with the ex-husband is a cause of mental torture for a woman.

As compared to the house of ex-husband, she could find a lot of love in house of her parents or relatives and live freely there and deliver the child in the comfort of her family.

Criticism of 'Iddah in case of triple-talaq divorce

If the husband says to his wife three times that he has divorced her, then she's formally considered to be divorced from him even if he said the three announcements in one sitting. The husband cannot remarry his wife unless she marries another man and gets divorced by him. This means that the moment the husband pronounces three Talaqs (announcements of divorce) in one sitting, his wife will need to go through a waiting period of three menstrual cycles where she's forced to stay at her ex-husband's home. But this ruling is criticized as unnecesary, since the parentage of the child could be determined after just the first menstrual cycle (as in case of the captive/slave woman). Therefore, logically the 'Iddah should be only one menstrual cycle long if the idea of assuring the parentage of any babies were to be followed to its logical conclusion[33]. Scholars claim that one of the purposes of the Iddah is to give a chance for reconciliation between the couple. This may be true in the case of a single or double talaq divorce, but after 3 Talaqs there's no chance of reconciliation which makes the additional two menstrual cycles not only meaningless but also mentally harmful for the divorced wife as she's forced to live with her ex-husband in the same home for three menstrual cycles.

When the husband divorces his wife, she will have to spend her Iddat in the matrimonial home. She must not leave the house during the day nor at night, nor can she make nikah with anyone else ... This rule will apply irrespective of whether the man issued one two or three divorces, and irrespective of whether he issued a talaaqul baa-in (irrevocable divorce) or a talaaq-ur-raj’ee (revocable Talaaq). The same rule will apply in all cases ... If she is observing her ‘Iddat in the same house wherein the man who issued a talaaqul baain to her is also living, she will have to observe strict Purdah (Hijab) with him.

Moreover, in the present modern era, it is not necessary to wait even for one menstrual cycle, as the pregnancy and paternity can be determined right away through the modern medical tests.

Implantation Bleeding Despite Being pregnant

Islamic preachers and scholars claim that the Islamic 'Iddah of 3 menstrual cycles is correct, since some women have implantation bleeding (bleeding from when the fertilized egg attaches to the lining of the uterus.) despite being pregnant, and it is difficult for a woman to differentiate between the periods and the implantation bleeding. Yet despite this rule, traditional Islamic law itself stipulates an 'Iddah of a prisoner/slave woman as only one menstrual cycle, in contradiction to this idea. If parentage were the main issue, the status of the woman (free or slave) should not matter. Also some jurists including Ibn Taymiyah say that the 'Iddah of a free Muslim woman in the case of Khul' is only one period.[34] Even Muhammad himself slept with Safiyah the same night when her first menstrual blood stopped, after he had murdered her previous husband. Note that Safiyyah was not a slave, but a free woman when Muhammad took her as a wife:

He (the Holy Prophet) then granted Saffiyyah emancipation and married her. Thabit said to him: Abu Hamza, how much dower did he (the Holy Prophet) give to her? He said: He granted her freedom and then married her. On the way Umm Sulaim embellished her and then sent her to him (the Holy Prophet) at night.
Narrated Anas bin Malik: We arrived at Khaibar, and when Allah helped His Apostle to open the fort, the beauty of Safiya bint Huyai bin Akhtaq whose husband had been killed while she was a bride, was mentioned to Allah's Apostle. The Prophet selected her for himself, and set out with her, and when we reached a place called Sidd-as-Sahba,' Safiya became clean from her (first) menses then Allah's Apostle took her into his bed.

There is no Sahih Hadith of the prophet in which he ever mentions the 'Iddah of 3 periods due to any implantation bleeding. Muhammad adopted the practice of 'Iddah from his native Arabian culture. It is in response to modern conceptions of biology and ideals about women's rights that these arguments about parentage have been formulated. But these arguments fall flat, as upon further inspection the contradictions in them are evident (such as having sex with a slave girl after one menstrual cycle). They are not based on the actual source material but rather on a desire to make the source material acceptable to a modern audience.

No waiting period in name of "mourning" for the captive/slave women

In spite of the aforementioned claims of concern for the well-being of women, according to traditional Fiqh (Islamic Jurisprudence) Muslim men are allowed to derive sexual pleasures from the virgin girls taken as war booty during Jihad without giving them any 'waiting period' to mourn their dead family members. As far as the non-virgin slaves taken as war booty are concerned, if they already have husbands, then vaginal coitus is not allowed till they become free of their first menstrual period, but the Muslim Mujhaahiduun (i.e. warriors) are allowed to undress them the same night and to take all kinds of other sexual pleasures and sexual favors from them aside from vaginal penetration.

وقال عطاء لا بأس أن يصيب من جاريته الحامل ما دون الفرج

Translation:

Atta said: ‘There is no harm to drive sexual pleasure from the body of the pregnant slave/(or prisoner) woman except from vagina’
Fath ِAl-Bari by Ibn Hajar, Dar Al-Ma'rifah, vol.4 p.423

According to Islamic Scholars, the Fiqh (Jurisprudence) of Imam Bukhari lies in the “Headings of Chapters” of his Book. And Imam Bukhari gave this heading in his book Sahih Bukhari[35]:

Chapter: If one buys a slave woman, can he then take her along with him in a journey without her completing her waiting period?

Under this heading, Imam Bukhari writes:

ولم ير الحسن بأسا أن يقبلها أو يباشرها. وقال ابن عمر ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ إذا وهبت الوليدة التي توطأ أو بيعت أو عتقت فليستبرأ رحمها بحيضة، ولا تستبرأ العذراء. وقال عطاء لا بأس أن يصيب من جاريته الحامل ما دون الفرج.

Translation:

Hasan Basri finds nothing objectionable in kissing a woman or to having sex with her. And Ibn Umar said that such a slave woman who is given as a present, or who is sold, or who is made free, but sex had been done with her before that, then she had to undergo a waiting period. And Atta said if a slave woman had become pregnant (from the earlier owner/husband), then still pleasure could be derived from the whole of her body, except for her vagina.

The sorrow and pain of such women are recorded in Tabari:

Ibn Ishaq said: After the Messenger of God conquered al-Qamus, Safiyyah bint Huyayy was brought to him, and another woman with her. Bilal (a companion), who was the one who brought them, led them past some of the slain Jews. When the woman who was with Safiyyah saw them, she cried out, struck her face, and poured dust on her head. When the Messenger of God saw her, he said, "Take this she-devil away from me!" ... The Messenger of God said to Bilal, when he saw the Jewish woman doing what he saw her do, "Are you devoid of mercy, Bilal, that you take two women past their slain men?"

The clear disregard for the well-being of women presents a conundrum for modern day advocates of these Islamic laws and traditions. On one hand, Islamic law advocates claim that a Muslim woman is not allowed to be wed during 3 periods/months long 'Iddah while she is mentally under stress after the divorce. Yet on the flip side of the coin, by endorsing a tradition with such endorsements of sexual slavery, they ignore any such mental stress for the prisoner women and girls. Far away from the subject of divorce, even after killing all the men of their family, Muslim men are allowed their use sex objects the very same night that their slavery begins. They are provided with no 'waiting period' to come out of their mental stress.

Contrary to Islam, even the laws of the Jewish Bible allowed the prisoner women to mourn their relatives for one complete month, during which men were not allowed to take any other sexual services from them.

יכִּֽי־תֵצֵ֥א לַמִּלְחָמָ֖ה עַל־אֹֽיְבֶ֑יךָ וּנְתָנ֞וֹ יְהֹוָ֧ה אֱלֹהֶ֛יךָ בְּיָדֶ֖ךָ וְשָׁבִ֥יתָ שִׁבְיֽוֹ:

יאוְרָאִ֨יתָ֙ בַּשִּׁבְיָ֔ה אֵ֖שֶׁת יְפַת־תֹּ֑אַר וְחָֽשַׁקְתָּ֣ בָ֔הּ וְלָֽקַחְתָּ֥ לְךָ֖ לְאִשָּֽׁה:

יבוַֽהֲבֵאתָ֖הּ אֶל־תּ֣וֹךְ בֵּיתֶ֑ךָ וְגִלְּחָה֙ אֶת־רֹאשָׁ֔הּ וְעָֽשְׂתָ֖ה אֶת־צִפָּֽרְנֶֽיהָ:

יגוְהֵסִ֩ירָה֩ אֶת־שִׂמְלַ֨ת שִׁבְיָ֜הּ מֵֽעָלֶ֗יהָ וְיָֽשְׁבָה֙ בְּבֵיתֶ֔ךָ וּבָֽכְתָ֛ה אֶת־אָבִ֥יהָ וְאֶת־אִמָּ֖הּ יֶ֣רַח יָמִ֑ים וְאַ֨חַר כֵּ֜ן תָּב֤וֹא אֵלֶ֨יהָ֙ וּבְעַלְתָּ֔הּ וְהָֽיְתָ֥ה לְךָ֖ לְאִשָּֽׁה:

ידוְהָיָ֞ה אִם־לֹ֧א חָפַ֣צְתָּ בָּ֗הּ וְשִׁלַּחְתָּהּ֙ לְנַפְשָׁ֔הּ וּמָכֹ֥ר לֹֽא־תִמְכְּרֶ֖נָּה בַּכָּ֑סֶף לֹֽא־תִתְעַמֵּ֣ר בָּ֔הּ תַּ֖חַת אֲשֶׁ֥ר עִנִּיתָֽהּ:

Marrying a Captive Woman

(10) When you go to war against your enemies and the Lord your God delivers them into your hands and you take captives,

(11) if you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife.

(12) Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nails

(13) and put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife.

(14) If you are not pleased with her, let her go wherever she wishes. You must not sell her or treat her as a slave, since you have dishonored her.

In creating these new rulings around taking the sexual pleasure of female sex slaves, Islamic law rejected the law of the Bible in this case, and more closely followed the laws of the pagan Arab society of the time of Muhammad, as it benefitted the Muslims financially and they were free to seek sexual pleasures through the prisoner women the same night.

References

  1. John L. Esposito, ed, (21 October 2004). The Oxford Dictionary of Islam. Oxford University Press. pp. 131. ISBN 978-0-19-975726-8. OCLC 286438886, 21 October 2004. https://books.google.com/books?id=E324pQEEQQcC. 
  2. Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website: Is it correct to think that fatwas may vary according to time and place?
  3. Women in Islamic Law: Examining Five Prevalent Myths
  4. What does Jahiliyah mean?
  5. 5.0 5.1 5.2 5.3 'Idda, Istibra' and Maintenance
  6. 6.0 6.1 6.2 Reason for the waiting period
  7. Sunnan Abu Dawud, Hadith 2158
  8. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.274
  9. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.277
  10. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.267,269
  11. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.277
  12. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.271 footnote.1
  13. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.269
  14. Daf’ Shubah by Taqiy Al-Din Al-Hisni, Dar Al-Mustafa, p.271 دفع شبه من شبَّه وتمرد لتقي الدين الحصني، دار المصطفى، ص271
  15. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.271
  16. Al-Bid’ah Wa Atharuha by Abu Ishaq Al-Huwayni, Al-Shamilah library, vol.5 p.13
  17. Islamweb.net Fatwa no.110547
  18. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.337
  19. The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.348,349
  20. Fiqh Al-Sunnah by Sayyid Sabiq, Dar Al-Kitab Al-Arabi, vol.2 p.337
  21. The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.349,350
  22. The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.353,354
  23. The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.2 p.104
  24. The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.350
  25. The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.25 p.114-16
  26. The Kuwaiti encyclopedia of jurisprudence by the Ministry of Religious Endowments and Islamic Affairs in Kuwait, vol.29 p.353,354
  27. Fatwas Website Islamqa.Org. Laws of Iddat.
  28. Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website
  29. IslamQA Fatwa Website
  30. Reason for 4 months 10 days long Iddah of a widow [1]
  31. Widow has to observe 'Iddah even if she never saw the husband after the marriage, or even if she is a small child. [2]
  32. Staying in the house of ex-husband, but also doing Purdah (Hijab) from him.
  33. Iddah of 3 menstrual cycles in case of 3 Talaqs in one sitting
  34. 'Iddah in Khul' is one menstrual period
  35. Sahih Bukhari